scrapbooks and day dreams!

more snow! more snow! more snow! on this snowy day, i've been going through some old papers and journals...i'm hoping to clear out some more...more of the stuff!

i just found a scrapbook i had for dreams and color ideas and just things i liked along the way.  i've taken some pics of my scrapbook....they were torn out from random magazines or catalogues...from maybe 10 years ago....so i'm not able to give credit.

grace came by to look over the dreams that i had....amazing to see how much that dream/idea/likes and colors came to be a reality in my life!  i think this is amazing...it makes me think that the subconcious mind got the message!

here we go down daydream lane....this is dedicated to sister cecilia marie, my third grade teacher, who told my mom in a teacher conference that i daydreamed!  some of those dreams came true!

i know what i believe about writing things down and imagining and dreaming what you want....i had a list of the qualities that i wanted in a great guy....it happened. we had a list of all of what we wanted in a home....and we have all of that in our home. and just like my scrapbook, those lists were tucked away and forgotten about.....until after some of these dreams came true ..in one way or another.  

 

look at this picture...it's amazing to see this from a magazine and see our pics in our family room, below!

o.k....some of my pictures are crooked!

this is a nantucket basket

 doorstop...i love nantucket baskets.  my first trip to nantucket, i was 7...that was where my love for the island began...i don't have the doorstop, i have other nantucket baskets though.  i still dream of the day that i'l get the nantucket basket brass door knocker.  it's a dream...so who knows?

a needlepoint pillow that i love...i have lots of pretty needlepoint pics...i'll try to take some pics.

below are some of the rugs that i had in my scrapbook of dreams...some of our rugs have been similar!

above are some of the rugs that i had in my scrapbook of dreams...some of our rugs have been similar!

 

we have an antique "breadbox" that was in the bedroom that biff  shared with his fun twin brother growing up in their house from @1775.

i always love blue and white....i have quite a collection of blue and white dishes....we used to have ours up on the kitchen wall....i loved that.  then we changed to the print of rockefeller center at christmas by leroy neiman. we love it because that's where biff proposed on 12-30-93!

it's a great print that took a long time to track down.  my mom first saw it in a saks fifth avenue catalogue.

she had her friend at saks check all of the stores to find it....never found it.  a few years later, i tried on the internet and found it.  now, it's on the kitchen wall....it makes me happy everyday!  the colors are beautiful.

 

 more blue and white.  we have these cabinets in our kitchen...and we have the white beadboard!

 

 i always love dishes.  i'm not sure if it's hereditary...but i'm sure i got the gene!  thanks mom!

more pretty glass cabinets!  i love our glass cabinets and lots of white in our kitchen...right now, we have black tile marble? countertops...our cabinets are still the original 1976 cabinets.  they were "pub brown"when we moved in and biff and i painted them.  we did our best, but we're not pros!

 

 more glass cabinets and drawer pulls like ours..ours are silver tone....and love that blue paint.  our blue is more of that laura ashley sapphire!

this was our pub brown color although its ripped out from a magazine as the before pic....dark! blah for me.

 

back to the same blue we have!

clean and crisp...love the wood floors!  we have white tile...great for a home with 2 kids, 2 dogs, 2 cats, 2 fish (the fish don't track in too much dirt, just a splash or two.)  i'm forever trying to clean the grout between the tile...chlorox seems to be the only thing that cleans our floors...not so eco friendly, but it helps.

biff's mom and dad gave us our kitchen table and chairs for a new house gift! we have lived at this table.

notice the plate racks that i love so much....no computer there anymore, it was a temporary thing.

more scrapbook.

 

i just never tire of it. more. more. more.

daydream scrapbook.

 

more blue and white in scrapbook.

more scrapbook.

 

more inspiration....for my project table!

love these colors and have them in the family room.

scrapbook.

love the black  and love the wood stairs and the light house newel posts...scrapbook.

love this red couch.  our first family room couch in this house was red duck with khaki trim!  it was so happy to walk in and see that burst of red. scrapbook.

more of our family 

room colors.scrapbook.

i love chandeliers....scrapbook.

 

scrapbook.....love the shades...not the bows.  i just love some of the whimsy...but i don't really like too foofy.

my forever dream!

dream/scrapbook.

dreams do come true!

 

i love black frames.

ideas..scrapbook.

our black framed photos on our white shelves.

 we tried out blue in the family room.

 blue jean couch and chair, lots of blue and white...now we're back to yellow walls in the family room.

our wicker so comfy...... 

still planning on having on a porch....when we build it.  it's on our list. nothing better on a summer night with a good book...

 we love books and books and books.

 here's another scrapbook page.

and some real books.

and below, our bookcases that we put in a few years ago.  we love our books...how do you live without your favorite books?

 

...still planning on having on a porch....when we build it.  it's on our list. nothing better on a summer night.  i have some of my best summer memories from my uncle burke and aunt martha's house....a little house, in connecticut, near the water with a great porch filled with family and friends of all ages, laughter, stories and  barbeque wafting through the air.  she always had wicker, old and new.....lots of beautiful plants, great art on the walls...it was an extension of her sweet home. aunt martha's my aunt who taught us all that it doesn't matter how big or small your house, how perfect or imperfect all of your "things" are,  it's the warmth and welcoming style you have that makes a house a home!  i think of her almost everyday!

and  while i was dreaming i went all of the way!

 well, at least we live in a beautiful town with beautiful homes on the water like this!

and like this.

 

and this.

and this.

as biff says about some of our dream houses

"easy to love" 

more dreams.

 

  

 

above is the sailboat pic that i had in the scrapbook maybe more than 10 years ago...and one of our biggest family dreams...we talked about it and hoped for a sailboat, we were on the lookout for the right boat for us! below, this is a bit like ours.

George Carlin Talks About "Stuff"

i have stuff and stuff and stuff...now i'm selling it on e-bay! littlemarymixup is on e-bay!!

selling stuff!

big day today! i've begun the e-bay biz... so exciting for me...it's the perfect way for me to have a little "shop" of my own. i've been wanting that for so long. it's just that i've lived a life of retail and wholesale and banking sales....i love the retail life and don't love the saturdays. i know if it's your store...you love it. only, i know me and i would be crying over a missed lacrosse game or a day sailing at the beach....and the rent!

now, i have a little spot to sell vintage things that i love or the multitude of clothing still in the closet with tags. just that "stuff" again..."stuff" piles up and it's my quest to get it out....electric guitars, unmatched silver, a few little wedgewood cups i bought in london, old jewelry....just "stuff."

i can really appreciate the old george carlin standup routine where he talks about stuff. i remember a few years ago when i was invited to "parties" where one very excited and enthusiastic woman would be standing in a group of other women.....innocent, unsuspecting women, just happy to break up a routine week, some were there just to glug some vino....before i knew what was happening, i'd be all pumped up over some baskets made by hand from ohio! there would also always be one woman or more who not only collected the baskets but had met the president of the basket company....and had made suggestions that would be available in the new line. people would buy these billion dollar baskets and chatter about them for weeks.

until the next "party" where another chirpy voice would be singing a song about scrapbooks. everyone should have scrapbooks of their children....not just the 843,000 pics per day that i had taken to record everyday of our babies' lives since birth...and already proudly slipped them into fine leather photo albums! photo albums were pase'....your child would be deemed deprived if they weren't presented to the world one individual photo at a time, in 3d! there were beautiful papers and stickers and scissors and paper cutters and carry alls. it was a world that could be mine. it would bring out my creativity, it would be a keepsake for days to come! and, i could pay money and be welcomed at scrapbooking parties with other happy moms just like me. yikes! i had friends who scrapbooked. they were creative and fun....i was afraid to be a part of the cult.

some reasons worthy of mentioning...i was in between jobs...or "in the midst of a career change" depending how you look at it. my sweet cousin came to visit. we were planning to go to lunch. it was a great idea! i thought that would be nice...i was trying out the "ladies who lunch scene"!

it was a new world i was entering...and it wasn't the lunch bunch, it was finding out that my cousin was there to sell me mary kay cosmetics. she was giving me a free makeover. ooh, what fun. a little dab here, a swish of mascara there and oh, did i mention that she didn't want to just sell me a mascara or a lipstick. she was telling me the money to be made at mary kay. it was no joke...pink cadillacs were just the beginning...for just $100., i could become my own boss. talk about catchy...especially while i was unemployed. so, i promptly wrote the check, i got my very own kit engulfed in pink...i not only had a mascara...i was an entrepreneur. there would be sales meetings! structure. and then i went to a meeting. that's how far i got on that road to riches! i was scared off by another cult of women with puffy pink lips and cheery cheeks!

i have no shame. when i was in my 20s, with a very good job in sales, a great guy that i worked with did a similar bait and switch...this was the beginning of my long journey...down the sucker path. kevin, told me about this great business opportunity. if i just met him out in a newly invented town at a hotel, i could be included in a very special event that would be even better than my sales career. hmmmm, never one to turn away an oppoortunity that comes knocking on my door, i told kevin that i'd meet him after dinner.

this was an opportunity. it was the best of the best who would become better than the best. all i had to do was write a check or charge this start up kit and i'd be on my way......and it was no time before kevin was holding my (don't shriek!)$450. for a kit of nu skin. i was off on my way...until i realized that nobody ever heard of nu skin....and thanks to me, no one that i knew would ever hear of nu skin. before my check was cashed, my enthusiasm was lost. ever the optimist, i've been open to lots of exciting opportunities!

it seems that i need a 12 step program for 12 step businesses that will give me the life i deserve...a yacht, an island...whatever. i get moved in the moment. it's taken years, but i have slowly backed out of those little house parties. i would pay you not to invite me.

the last time i bought something at one of those parties...the pressure is intense...i came home with THE best apple slicer ever made...for about $20. i got out cheap and left tire marks in the driveway as i sped away!

it was a problem...not anymore. i've gone cold turkey. it was the candle party that did it. candles, on a beautiful fall night, i had abandoned my sweet family to sit through a candle seminar. candles for the fireplace, candles for the bathroom, the mantel, the bedroom...the woman was a happy piromaniac! i sat on a friends couch and i thought why on earth am i here listening to this woman extol the virtues of candles...and i just have to say no.i would say no. i did say no.no, no, no, no, no, no! and my life became my own....i was free.

so, i do have "stuff"....lots and lots...for a variety of reasons. i give stuff away, i donate stuff, i hand me down stuff......and now, "littlemarymixup" on e-bay
is where i'm selling stuff!
http://clothing.shop.ebay.com/i.html?_nkw=polo+skirt+size+2&_sacat=11450&_trksid=p3286.m270.l1313&_odkw=polo+shirt+size+2&_osacat=11450

Valentine’s Day Tips, Ideas…Spoil Yourself & Others

Valentine’s Day Tips, Ideas…Spoil Yourself & Others

The Turtles Happy Together

Natalie Cole - L.O.V.E.

l-o-v-e!!

valentine's day?

valentines day.  what a nice day it is.  the sun is shining and bursting in our windows, the sky is blue and the temperature is beautiful...mid 30's.  by mid february, mid 30's in connecticut feels like a spring day.

this morning we woke up and shared a little valentine hug. i'm grateful to be so in love with biff...still. i remember the first valentines day the we were together. we were newly dating, trying to take it slow...we had such a good thing together, neither one of us wanted to speed it up and ruin everything. we were both somewhat shell shocked from previous relationships.....that make us laugh today.

i still ask biff to tell me his date stories.  i laugh so hard that i cry.  i feel those women's pain.  nothing was wrong with biff.  it was the situations that went wrong.  right place with the wrong date.

one of my favorite examples was the spring sunday morning that he took his date to the zoo.  one of those classic, romantic dates...until he walked into the dark reptile house and the giant snake appeared!  his date, terrified of snakes.....he learned at that moment .....she shrieked,went running to the exit leaving a trail of dust behind, pole vaulted over the turnstyle and ran for cover!  they got through the day. he tried to take her to the bird house but guess what?  another bad choice.  they pretty much stuck to the safety of the monkeys and the zebras and the giraffes!  he had a nice relationship for awhile, but it just wasn't right.  very nice...just not it.

he has other stories. different locations, different dates.  all nice women.  and of course, my nice biff. i love these stories.......not because of biff's good intentions and dates went awry, but because they were not meant to be.  had those same dates been me, i would have loved that time with biff.  i'm grateful because what wasn't their best date
with whatever mixups ensued was saved for me.  i laugh because i see things in a different way....biff's way.

had i not been going through some of my dates from hell at about the same time as biff, our timing never would have worked out to be so great for each other.  when one door closes, another opens....as the mother superior said in "the sound of music".(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aw-Om-t8iiM&feature=related)

gyneth paltrow found that out in "sliding doors"(http://www.videosurf.com/sliding-doors-87922)

it's not all about biff's dates. i had some not so great dates over the years too.....and it felt like years and years and years and years.....you get the picture.......i had the  "hometown guy" inviting me out to a live music show in a  classic new york city setting, some drinks, some loud music, some singing....while the music was playing, i  turned to "hometown guy" to smile  enthusiastically only to notice and anguished look on his face, covered with beads of sweat.  his eyebrows were furrowed, his jaw a bit tight and his words were weak.  it was shortly after that he suggested we leave.

that was fine with me.  it was late.  as he drove me home, he became even less talkative, more sweaty and i noticed his jaw was clenched as tightly as his hands were on the steering wheel.  i worked on some conversation...maybe he was nervous.....nothing.....more sweat....and a visible discomfort. hmmmm.  one date and it was pretty wierd.....oh, give him a chance, i thought.  maybe it's an off night.  he had barely put the car in park and he was ready to take off. good night.  bye.

it was weeks later when i was sitting with my aunt, who was asking whatever happened to "hometown guy"...she knew the family.....i told her my bizarre date story.  she said, "when was that, a few weeks ago?  isn't that when that bad stomach flu was going around?"  at that moment, it all made sense. we got hysterical laughing...it was nervous laughter....for "hometown guy". we could only imagine his discomfort and relief to get me out of that car!

oh, there are more with lots of variety....too many to mention, actually.  the more the merrier!  and they all make me even more grateful for waiting....waiting for the right guy!

this all started because of valentine's day.  i'm happy to say that after a morning hug, my coffee was delivered to my bedside.  this was no ordinary coffee.  we had a littlemixup with our keurig coffee maker yesterday....one button pushed at the wrong time(kind of like dating!) sent the keurig into coffee lockdown. not good.  biff called the coffee guru at the customer service number and was talked through it like captain sully on u.s.air, the plane that landed in/on the hudson river last year.(http://www.google.com/search?q=u.s.air+captain+sully+new+york+times&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a)

the keurig was fixed. and i got coffee in bed.  i walked downstairs to find t.j. flipping pink pancakes on the griddle. coffee and pink pancakes...who could ask for a better valentine's day? 

always a challenge!

it's past my bedtime. we just finished watching the olympics....we saw some of the moguls and some of the luge.  it's so exciting.  the energy and determination of these olympic athletes is so invigorating.  they have such passion.....and have such great accomplishments.

i had alot of energy fueled by determination today too....it wasn't the adrenaline pumping stuff of olympic athletes...i had to be the coach and pump my "athletes" up just to get the dreaded job of getting our basement back into playroom condition.  it's been awhile and there has been some slow and steady decline in the terrain....my "athletes" have lost interest.

it was about 2 years ago that we had some crazy noah and the arc storm come our way. for the only time in our homeowner lives, we had water come into our basement.....it poured down from our full gutters.....it trickled down through the bilco....down the stairs....under the door....onto the floor ....juat enough to create a puddle...that grew until it seeped and seeped......and seeped some more into the wall to wall carpet that had only been installed a year or so before

no matter how we tried, that carpet was destined for the dumpster.....which caused me to be down in the dumps.  while other people were off in glamorous vacation destinations, biff and i were hauling wet carpet and the padding up the bilco stairs....lugging it, dripping all over us, across the backyard, and heaving the sloppy mess into the dumpster.

we tried to work out a plan.  life got busy...the plan was hazy....hazy goals produce hazy results.  so, it took us some time to decide how to tackle this problem....would we put in wall to wall just to have this nightmare again.  oh....i should say that i recognize this is not that big of a deal in the scheme of life events....just a wet and squishy waste of money and a whole comfortable room that we had all started to enjoy.

until the poseidon adventure.  tears streamed down my face as i worked with mops and wet vacs and towels and sham wows.  and that project lost momentum just because of sheer fear.  fear....of water and mops and anything wet ....i was shattered.  o.k., not shattered...soaked!  soaked to the gils.  that room had been put together with alot of effort to have a "lego place" for unbelievable lego projects created by t.j. and biff...and grace had a part in it too.  this was a place of major creativity and peace and conversation for the whole family.  we had couches, a t.v., tables for artwork, homework...a ping pong table and my project table for just me.  it was great.  until it wasn't.

we have tried to get it back to that fun place.  it's been a challenge to get my family to join in the reindeer game with me.  i aded large rugs.  i added  a little bigger t.v.  nothing! no one!  the legos were getting dusty...the dollhouse had lost appeal and grace was having friends hunkerdown in her bedroom with ipod tunes, a mirror and a closet full of clothes to share. times they were a changin.

i.ve been working hard to keep my "athletes" updated on these events for quite some time.  the first day of vacation seemed to be the right time to boost the morale and accomplish big things in our olympic training center...our basement.  it was a real challenge and competition was encouraged. thankfully, today we got alot done  ...everyone helped....everyone had a personal best.  we took pictures of the best legos built over time...not the kit stuff..some of the thinking, engineering and creating involved  in these  photo worthy projects was outstanding....and the memories of the moments shared making the piece were even better.

we packed some things up, we painted the whole basement, we sanded the big coffee table.....biff even went to order the rug.....and made plans to get it in.   this was a big day.  we're feeling pumped we're not gold metal material yet.....i think by the end of the week, we may be awarded the silver....maybe the bronze if my team starts slacking.

we have plans to get things done...we have plans to see some friends, we have plans to see some family.....i believe...i believe we can reach our goal. i know we can do anything when we do it together and we all commit to getting the job done.

we may even be the underdog....but that's o.k. because it was worth it just to hear grace and t.j. discuss their accomplishments at the end of the night.  i was so proud of them!  they don't know it, but i always knew they could do it.  when we set our minds on something, we get it done!  sooner or later!  and sooner rather than later is always a challenge!

Live aid - 1985 Usa For Africa - We Are The World

can't believe this is 25 years old!

We Are The World 25 For Haiti - Official Video

love this song...old and new version.

let the games begin!

watching the olympics on t.v. is so much fun...seeing the olympic hopefuls from around the world waving their flags is very moving....they are the best of the best of their countries. wow!

more than wow actually. i never did anything that competitive.....well not many people have done anything that competitive!  but, i never really had one thing that i loved so much....or...that i excelled at ....and....did competitively.  i guess i wasn't that competetive.  most of my life, i've just done things that i loved.....but for fun.  it never occurred to me to even want to be a better skater that would compete.

i just circled and circled around the same rink for years.

i rode my bike around the neighborhood and around the town....and to friends' houses.

i skipped. i jumped. i hopped. i ran...just to run. i played.

i swam.....again, just having fun and swimming for hours and hours at a time.

i walked for miles and loved it always....especially if i was with a friend...and talking.

i went horseback riding around and around the ring.

i love skiing...just going up on the lift and skiing down, going up and skiing down....hopefully in one piece.

i tried things.  i just never even thought of doing anything competitive.  i entered art contests, i even won some....and i was happy to enter the contest.  i entered radio contests and won a couple of those.  i entered a cake bake off in girls scouts....the scout leaders' daughter won first place....2nd place went to the other scout leaders' daughter. i played baseball with the big kids when i was little....i just wanted to hit the ball and get to first base....and then i was happy. i loved spelling bees and always won...now they have spell check. nobody even cares that i can spell.  i played volleyball on the beach...with lots of friends.... that was fun competition with friends...intense for us...not for the mens' and womens' volleyball team.  in college, i ran for class president...against one of my best friends....and she won.  i was sorry not to win...... but i was happy for her.

i did lots of things. lots and lots of things....not in competition....hmmmm?  does that say anything about my personality?  maybe. does that mean that i wasn't encouraged to be SOMETHING?  does that mean that i just didn't try?  i'm not sure.

i'm not sure.  i didn't listen to my mom when she kept suggesting i take tennis....i loved the tennis skirts and tretorns...but i wanted to get to the pool.  pretty much, in the summer, if there's water...i want to be in it. i certainly need to live by the water.  it's a big part of my life and it's a great big part of my life with biff and our family. i really need water in my life.  i walk our dogs at the beach all winter long.

water just makes me happy.  i never thought of doing anything in the water but swim and play and dive and jump.  hmmm.....i was happy like that?  i always wanted to sail.  i did it with friends when i was really young....i still remember that unbelievable moment...that ahhhhh! feeling....that rush.....having the wind in my face and pulling lines trying to help.  i loved the wind and the water and the boat and the fun.

years later, i was on a sailboat with my friend, patti....and her husband, david....we were out sailing on the long island sound.  it was that same feeling. i still remember the wind changing at about 3 pm....that day,david said the wind always changes around 3.....now that i can sail, i think of david every time we're checking the wind mid afternoon.  i was also out on the boat with david when patti suggested i race with him....and 2 others...he needed crew.  patti was getting her hair cut...or so she said.

that day, i went out on the 23' sailboat with 3 guys....david was the skipper.  here i was...with my friend's relatively new husband...we're in a race....i had never been in a race...i just loved to be on a sailboat and would do anything asked of me....just to be a part of it.

i thought..."what a nice guy, that david....my friend married a great guy."  so, i'm out on this boat...i'm loving life...i'm thinking .."wow! this is where i'm meant to be.  i love life!"  just then, david, the nice guy turned into captain hook...the race had begun...david had begun "pull the line...uncleat that...cleat that...move over...**&^...watch out...@&@#... WATCH OUT FOR THE BOOM!" *@&%....o.k. here we go....

to this day, i don't know if we won, came in 2nd or if we placed...it was unbelievable....just unbelievable.

we all got off the boat.  patti was there to greet us. we all shared stories. unbelievable. patti wanted to know how i liked it..."how was david?" ...i said,"wow! he turned into ahab out there!  that was intense!  he was cursing like a sailor! wow!  and now he's back to david."  patti said, "i know...that's why i didn't go."  "HAH!" i said.

you'd think i'd never want to sail again.  wow...all of that yelling, being yelled at and pushing and wind and water... and pulling lines...I LOVED IT!  and i couldn't wait to do it again. by the way, i have another friend with an endearing name for her husband when he's racing...."boatman"....he takes on a new personality when he races....we all check in with him to see if he's having a "boatman" day.

 oh, i also ran in some 10ks for a time...i loved running...it made me feel great...i loved being in such great shape.  i loved the runners high.  a friend and i saw a sign for a road race in bridgehampton, on long island...i said,"how long is a 10k?"  my friend answered,"oh,probably about what you run...you know...about 3 or 4 miles."  great. i was signing up.

off i went to the race early one summer morning.  i got to the race...ready to run...all set...go!  half way through the potato fields and by the ocean road...i was feeling kinda tired....i asked a man next to me how much longer...it didn't  make sense.  it didn't add up.  i asked how long 10k was....it was 6.2 miles!  i finished. i was proud. i ran in all kinds of races after that.

i trained for the new york marathon after we had grace and t.j.  i was determined.  i trained for months....we were new in town so biff would make maps for me ...i would carry frozen water with me...it would melt as i ran.  it kept me cool on very hot summer days.  i loved it.  i got up to 14.9 miles. i loved it.

then, something happened...i panicked....i didn't think i could do it....i didn't know anyone else running.  i would be alone...what if?  what if...."  yup.  i didn't run in the marathon.  i'll never know.  i went to bed at night, saying to biff..."i can't believe i didn't do it...why didn't i do it?" i was making myself crazy....and then, biff said, "you ran 14.9 miles when you trained....when in your life have you ever run that far?"  he put it into perspective.  i was 40 years old....i had run 14.9 miles.  i was proud. i let it go.  i was just proud that i tried...i don't even know if it matters now.  i guess it would be great to say i did it....now, i look back and say...."i did 14.9 miles." and i'm happy.  with a husband and two small kiddies, that was an accomplishment in itself to even get the time to train."

and i still ride may bike with biff for miles and miles. i run sometimes. i hike. i walk the dogs at the beach...on the road....i move.  i still swim...i love swimming...i love the rythym that takes over.  i just do lotsa stuff.  

i guess it's o.k. i'm not even a competitive mom.  some moms used to brag about their babies' naps, molars and toys. i don't go there.  i love my kids.  i just don't go there. i'm proud of my kids.  i just don't get competitive about it.

i keep my own score...with myself.  i try to assess every day if i did something better than before...i work to do a little better. i try to be aware of how i do, how much effort i put into any given thing. is that competitive?

so, are my kids competitive.  sometimes.  they seem to love what they do.  they seem to have fun, too.  they have tried lots of things.  they just keep trying out new things.  i like that.

we all like sailing...the kids have done lots of racing.  they have fun...they want to win. sometimes they do ...sometimes they don't...life goes on.....and they do lots of things...and they have lots of friends...and they love music....girl stuff....boy stuff....and they do things they like.

i love sailing...so does biff.  i keep trying to get better. so does biff.  the kids are great sailors.  we keep trying.  biff and i have raced too.  we have done our best.  we have never come in 2st or 2nd or 3rd or...........but, we're happy!

all that matters....to us...is that we still love each other and we keep laughing and we keep trying to get better...we try to be the best parents....we try....it's not a race....we just want to do our best. we want to have love,fun, laughter enjoy each other and our kids too.  we just keep trying. just like the olympics, let the games begin!

                   

simple things together.

hi!  it's friday and i'm happy to say that after school today vacation begins. next week is our winter vacation. it reminds me that spring is coming.

yesterday was my niece's birthday.  she turned 26.  it's her birthday that seems to be my marker for spring....the sky is lighter, the days are a bit longer and milder.....the day will come....spring is on it's way.  it's her birthday... how does time fly?  it seems like yesterday and a million years ago at the same time.  i always remember the day as a big event in my life....because the joy of a new baby is like no other.  this new little creation was the first baby in our family since i was born!  o.k.....it's not all about me....well...maybe it's kind of about me....but it's really about how exciting that day was for me!

i had slept over marybeth's up on 85th street in new york...where i lived at the time.  we had made plans to do something on saturday but when the phone rang at about 7:30 a.m., the plans  changed instantly.  it was my mom...calling me to let me know that claire had been born!  we were both so excited, we were squealing with joy!  marybeth began jumping for joy!

who knew how much my life would change all because of this new little gift to our family.  i talked to my brother, the new dad, he was as giddy as a 6'4" guy could get...he was stammering..."she's beautiful..her name is "claire".....she's just beautiful...she's pink!"  i told him i'd be getting a train out to see her.  they were living in our hometown...on long island...i could be there by lunch.

meanwhile, marybeth and i went to breakfast....just amazed to think that i had just become "an aunt"....we talked about what little gift i could bring....to the baby ....and my sister in law!  any opportunity to shop! i went to a great upper eastside bookstore next door to the diner....i looked for a children's book with the name "claire"....the sweet name of the new baby.

i couldn't find a book...i didn't have time to "shop"...i had to make a dash to penn station, to get out to manhasset, to see that new baby.  my brother's girlfriend (not the one who had the baby!) picked me up at the train...we had lunch....and went to the hospital to see claire and her mom.  i hadn't been able to find any gift but a little balloon that said,"it's a girl".....not a balloon on a string...a balloon on a stick....meant to go in a bouquet.  hey, it's the thought!

we got to the hosppital.  i was beside my self...i couldn't wait....we stopped to see carla, the new mom.  i stood with tears in my eyes....and my stick balloon!  we hugged....and then i was off to see the baby.  i saw her in her incubator...her deluxe suite, i called it.....i had charlie brown tears streaming out of my eyes!  she was beautiful. i saw my brother...and i cried some more.  i was so happy to have this baby added to our family!

well, who ever could have known how she would change our lives.  a sweet little girl that gave us so much....she brought laughter and sweetness and awe like nobody else could!  my sister in law was so sharing with her....that was another gift....she shared this little gift with us.  she let me rent her out and take little road trips to the city, to museums, to the beach, to the movies.  she made life more fun.  it was the first time in my life that i got to see, first hand, through a child's eyes.

she prepared me for motherhood....kind of.  except, with her, i was the fun aunt....auntie mame.  my kids don't see me that way....they get some of that fun and that spirit.....it's just that i have to add discipline to the mix....that just changes things a bit.

sometimes in life, it's the simple things that make the connection.  here are some of the things that happened with claire that made her laugh and still laugh today:

try on size 14 men's sneakers in the shoe store.
try on high heels, silver with 5"heels and pretend to buy them!
drive in the car pretending that there are zoo animals in the backseat with her.
buy her a pretzel and a drink and sit on the steps of the metropolitan museum of art.
go on the carousel in central park.
dive to the beach with burt and ernie....bert and ernie picking out a beach house.
having her scared of a thunder storm, running to my jetta and finding the sunroof open.
eating ice cream together and sitting on the curb.
walking through f.a.o.schwartz, not buying anything, having the "welcome to our world" embedded in our heads for the rest of our lives.
visiting her in college with our kids and blasting "broadway kids" c.d. in our mini van on our way home from dinner.
taking her on a ski trip with biff and i....telling our own scary stories while driving home....each one of us adding a sentence.
stopping at my college in the snow....taking a tray from the cafeteria....and teaching her how to use the tray as a sled.....having her land in 4" of mud and melted snow and cry.....so, to make her feel better, i went down the hill behind her and made my own big, muddy splash!  she  stopped crying.
having her sleep over, letting her have a soft place to sleep with me sleeping on the floor....waking up under a billowing geen plant.
lying down on our bed with our heads upside down and making upside down faces with our upside down mouths...drawing mustaches and eyeballs.
baking cookies
taking her to the zoo in new york city and finding out tthat we were in the petting zoo with bunnies and all she wanted was a monkey or a giraffe.
riding on a major  roller coaster with her when she was five and i was screaming,"I LOVE YOU CLAIRE!"....because i thought we were going to die.
showing her nice boyfriend pictures of her when she was a little kid.
visiting "gramma" in the hospital and having no token to get out of the parking lot.....so we rolled over the grass....we paid the hospital on the next trip.
when a light bulb popped out of my first new car as we drove over a bump in the road.

these are some of the highlights of our days together.  just the little things....just time....just simple....just fun!  no matter what age, i'm a big believer in giving time....cuz really that's all we have.....time to share.  i don't really remember the stuff i've given her....it's broken or lost or just gone.....it's the times we remember!

now the kids are home from school.  vacation has officially begun....i'd like to spend some time with our kids........ have fun and just do some of the simple things together.

What a Wonderful World - Louis Armstrong

we had this song as our last dance at our wedding....i feel like it applies to everyday and every celebration in our lives.