Wednesday, April 21, 2010

spring is bursting out all over!

at my favorite connecticut farm....ashlawn farm in old lyme....so much beauty....understated and lovely everywhere i turn!  it's always fun to stop in for my coffee...it's got that general store type of atmosphere!
it's always got people stopping in for coffee and a quick chat...sometimes folks sit and stay awhile share stories and a cup o joe....or java....or coffee...or cafe'....latte'....iced coffee...
the coffees are from around the world, roasted right here in connecticut!  it's the only coffee roaster from mystic to guilford, quite a bit of the shoreline!
just fun!  i look forward to stopping in! 
this farm has been owned by the same family for 100 plus years.  the family today do the roasting to update the way a connecticut farm can survive! 
they're a young family working...taking time to stop and say hello....jumping, stomping, singing, talking and galloping through the coffee bar from time to time is their little boy who we've all watched grow up there!  when they're not at school, we see his older brother and sister.....stopping in for milk or a smoothie....and talking to the locals...and passers through.

it's got a certain magic at the farm....there's a wonderful peacefulness....with all of the animals and barns and acres and acres of sprawling land.... always with friendly faces and welcome smiles.

where in the world do you know like this?  go there!  today! find your place...where people stop and say hello....get to know someone new...at the grocery store....the newspaper store....the kids' school....

below is tiffany farm, also in old lyme!  i love to see if the cows are lying down...i know it's going to rain....that's wht my mom said...so i know it must be true....she was an old school yankee, far from a farmer, but she must have read the farmer's almanac!  she also told me that when you can see the back of the leaves on the trees, it will rain.  massachusetts born and bread, my mom loved the beach....i think that's why she had such an interest in the weather!  she always said,"every day at the beach is a good day!" 
that's so true!  for me, the beach and the ocean is where i go for peace and strength and energy and warmth...even on the coldest day, the sun can warm me like nowhere else!  there's no other place that gives me the spiritual boost and grateful spirit!  where do you go for that kind of joy and peace....alone or with someone you love...
where is your place?
find it!  go there!  breathe the air!  really be there!  listen. be quiet. take time....just for you. be alone. don't get twitchy in the aloneness....enjoy it moment by moment!  look. pray. be thoughtful. take a moment to really listen.
clara, our wonderful family maid, more of a loving family member....really loving and good to her core....used to tell me to listen to the plants drink up the water.  listen.  as you water your plants, shhhhh! quiet.  listen to the marvel of nature.  
be somewhere....and really be there.  go somewhere and really think about where you're going....not about what you'll be doing when you get there.....just enjoy the trip!  look at the flowers.  look at all of the new babies in the world!  they are everywhere....tis the season for new moms to be out with their new babies.  say hello to a new mom.  encourage her. look at the gift of new life....look at the miracle of life.  if you have your own living miracles, be thankful....tell your living miracles, big or small, that you
LOVE THEM LIKE CRAZY!
 wave to a baby in the grocery store. call someone you love....ask them how they are....really how they are.  not what they do, not what they accomplished today, not how much they travel, no the itinerary.....just ask how the friend or family is.  maybe they'll tell you that they're busy!  maybe they'll tell you they have no time.....but, ask them...how they really are.  for real.  the work, the travel, the party, the traffic is not real. be real.  now. with everyone you see. 
 little by little, your day will change. you'll listen....so you will actually hear people. you may make them smile.  maybe even laugh.
 look at this...tell someone like me that my lipstick looks like an old lady, it's smeared up above my lip!! tell some one they have toilet paper on their shoe....or maybe not!
start by smiling....just for fun.  see who smiles back.  it's amazing. it's contagious!  say hello to someone older...a little older or a lot, a lot older. offer a hand. not a big deal to you.  just a little help.  maybe to a neighbor.

let someone "cut" the line in front of you at the grocery store. people are amazingly grateful....such a teeny amount of kindness.  

talk to your check out lady.  if you're buying hershey kisses, open the bag....offer one.  i always offer....mostly, they are thrilled and embarrassed....and then they say,"YES, I'D LOVE ONE!" give them more...for later!  just think...how much you can change someone's day!

little things. miniscule things. call the check out person by name....it makes them smile!

one little bit at a time! it's really fun.  take some of that time today....just for you...to be....thoughtful....alone....quiet.  maybe you won't even tell anyone you did that good deed...it will be your little secret!  bake cookies and mail them.  put cut flowers at your neighbors' front door!
   leave candy or lollipops for your mail carrier! 
 buy yourself some bubbles! yes....bubbles. blow bubbles!
laugh.  alone.  just feel the fun. 
 listen. hear. give. sing. jump. dance. laugh. breathe. dream. write. call someone and share some joy!
 if all of this seems uncomfortable and crazy and kooky, all the more reason for you to go out. run, don't walk.  we all need to lighten up. enjoy the world around us....one little bit at a time....start today. wait. really. start NOW. we get one life....LIVE IT YOUR BEST!
SPRING IS BURSTING OUT ALL OVER!
SHARE SOME JOY!

XOXOXO


Monday, April 19, 2010

"Do what you can, where you are, with what you have." Theodore Roosevelt

i feel like i've always lived like that! as a little girl, i remember being so creative, working with whatever i could to make what i wanted.  clever.  very clever.
even then, i was aching to have a store....o.k., it wasn't that fancy pants....i made my dream come true in the basement of our house!

i had everything out on the ping pong table....neatly organized by category.  i things around the perimeter of the room.  i used scarves as delightful decorations.
music was playing on the radio. sea shell necklaces and bracelets made by me were on display! 

of course, i worked for days to prepare my indoor store.....decorating, pricing, organizing, sending personalized invitations.....so much creativity and energy for one little girl's sale.
today, it would be a job just for a little kid to pencil in the date for the sale!  there would be conflicts...not involving the sale but to have a date FOR the sale. 

busy. busy. busy. everyone is busy. no time to pencil in a family dinner.spending time with family is a part of of growing up.  spending time with family is a spring board for living. time together teaches  us how to live in the world outside of our families.

kids are busy, parents are busy, grandparents are busy, aunts and uncles are busy, friends are busy, families are busy, nieces and nephews are busy.

who's going to be left? every generation seems to be busier. every generation seems to move a little bit further away from home....what will family be like in 25 years?

i already feel like jane jetson....i have my own george, played by biff! his boy, elroy played by t.j., daughter judy, played by grace! i have no "rosie", the cleaning lady that seems to think i have to program it like "rosie".....and of course, i'm well covered on the dog, "astro"....that would be played by my 2 astros, daisy and fitzy!
one big happy family in the fast lane!  zooming by each other from planet to planet!  even george/biff
having mr. spacely zip by to check on business. r.t., biff's boss is no mr. spacely.  they have their i-phones and computers....they're not quite so invasive. 

 "r.t." likes biff having family time...he believes that if the family is happy, biff is happy.  if biff is happy at work, the family  is happy.  

kind of the feel good, you look good.....you look good, you feel good mentality.  i like it.
   the first time i spoke to r.t., i was alone with my little baby grace....i was up to my elbows in boxes...giant moving boxes. biff and i had had just moved to boston for him to start his new sales territory.  "r.t." had movers for us...it was all taken care of....except for the emotions of leaving "home"/family with a brand new baby! the move was an awesome move....created just so that biff would have even better sales success as a new husband and father .  

it was the beginning of our life as  a new family!  our new life together....far away from friends and family!  we hadn't thought of that when we told the movers that they didn't have to unpack for us.  we told them we were good.  we told them we had it all under control....after all, we were practically newlyweds, how much could we have to unpack?

that was when we had our first indication that some of life's basic tasks were a tad bigger with a baby than we had realized.
biff was off at work...a good thing...he loved his new territory....we both loved our new boston life....but....

we had no friends.  we had now family. we were just us.  and little sleeping, eating, crying, waking, cooing grace.  grace certainly couldn't help us unpack.
family came and went.  they were all happy for us to be off in a new place, creating our own family lives.  they could visit, it was great!  they could help with the baby a bit....but, they couldn't feed the baby.  that was my piece of the puzzle.

and one day...with boxes up to my elbows....r.t. called to speak to me! he was thrilled to have us live in the same place where he still had family.  he wanted to hear all about our new home, the move, the town, the baby!
that's when i choked out the words..."it's great...we lovvve it."
he somehow detected my tentative tone.  hmmmm?  

and that's when he said, 
"hakuna matata!"
and it was that day, while grace lay sleeping in my arms, that i learned

"hakuna matata!"


“Hakuna Matata” lyrics

Music by Elton John, lyrics by Tim Rice
Performed by Max Casella, Tom Allan Robbins, Scott Irby-Ranniar, and Jason Raize

Colors:
  • Timon
  • Pumbaa
  • Both
  • Simba

Hakuna Matata! What a wonderful phrase
Hakuna Matata! Ain't no passing craze
It means no worries for the rest of your days
It's our problem-free philosophy
Hakuna Matata!
Hakuna Matata?
Yeah. It's our motto!
What's a motto?
Nothing. What's a-motto with you?
Those two words will solve all your problems
That's right. Take Pumbaa here
Why, when he was a young warthog...
When I was a young wart hog
Very nice
Thanks
He found his aroma lacked a certain appeal
He could clear the savannah after every meal
I'm a sensitive soul though I seem thick-skinned
And it hurt that my friends never stood downwind
And oh, the shame  He was ashamedThought of changin' my name What's in a name?And I got downhearted  How did ya feel?Everytime that I...
Hey! Pumbaa! Not in front of the kids!Oh. Sorry
Hakuna Matata! What a wonderful phrase
Hakuna Matata! Ain't no passing craze
It means no worries for the rest of your days
It's our problem-free philosophy
Hakuna Matata!
Hakuna Matata! Hakuna matata!
Hakuna Matata! Hakuna matata!
Hakuna Matata! Hakuna matata!
Hakuna Matata! Hakuna--
It means no worries for the rest of your days
It's our problem-free philosophy
Hakuna Matata!
(Repeats)
I say "Hakuna"
I say "Matata"
 it was a great lesson for me. 
i learned lots of lessons of adapting
 and using what you have. doing the best
 with what you have.
 r.t., no mr. spacely, made it all clear!  thankfully!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=
ejEVczA8PLU 






Sunday, April 18, 2010

why do i love this texture?
it seems that it draws my attention....it seems to fill all of my senses.  i can smell the beach air, the weathered boardwalk, the salt. these are glimpses of the summer...
i can see the beach, feel the sand, smell the salt water and the lotion....sometimes coppertone lotion....which still takes me back to summers of my childhood....i can hear the seagulls, the clank of the lines on the boats' masts, i can hear the waves lapping gently or crashing boldly! i can feel the sand, pebbly or powdery soft....and i'm instantly transported to my favorite place.....of anywhere in the world.
pretty big, huh?  just weathered wood makes my mind travel. that's all it takes.

it's amazing. everyone has something.  sometimes, it's the texture of fabric....usually, it's color. i still remember the colors in a house in nantucket...a spring meadow green bedroom with the atlantic ocean as the backdrop and a summer sky blue with the magnificent meadow as the backdrop!  i was so blown away that my enthusiasm would have seemed insincere had our friends not known me and my love of color! 

sometimes, a lilt of a brogue can bring me back to ireland....i can feel the damp air by the water, smell the beer in a pub or see the faces of freckled irish children.

pebbles and rocks and sea glass and sand...all different from one beach to the next....every time i'm at the beach i can get lost in the close ups of some shells, rocks or pebbles....sea glass.

why? what moves you...almost to tears?   a brand new baby always gets me.  what could be more amazing than a new life.... just miraculous to think how something so spectacular can arrive in our arms and bring so much joy to so many!  to see or hold a new baby... a new life and all of the potential for this new, living being is breathtaking!

why? what moves you...almost to tears?   a brand new baby always gets me.  what could be more amazing than a new life.... just miraculous to think how something so spectacular can arrive in our arms and bring so much joy to so many!  to see or hold a new baby... a new life and all of the potential for this new, living being is breathtaking! 
 the photos above were taken last week.....while visiting the firefighters who delivered t.j., almost 14 years ago. 
we were all at the fire house looking at "t.j.'s engine" with the stork on it, when one of the guys' wives arrived with her 15 day old baby boy, i was awestruck...it was so moving to me to think that t.j. was smaller than that when our team of firefighters delivered him....the gift of life!
random but real.
 t.j.'s stork on engine #2.
i love this blog. 
it's so great to write.
i've enjoyed this for 6 months...it's like an anniversary for me. it's been fun, i've had to have some discipline to sit down and write.

i've learned lots and lots about my computer.  i've gained confidence a the computer.  i have a long way to go.  a very long way....in computer time.

i do write for me. it's mine.  it's all my own. and as t.j. and grace say. who would want to read your blog?  who? why do you bother?
i don't really know. i thought it would be a good thing to get my writing out there in the world.  a blog seemed the right place for me to do it.  just get it out there.  

for all of the many times that different folks have said, "you should write a book"....i thought this would be a good place to start.  i have lots to tell.  lots of observations. lots of feelings. lots of mixups. lots of memories. lots to put in writing.
i find myself saying after 6 months, like the kids, who cares? who really cares?
i have some "followers"...28....only 28....after 6 months.  that's better than none.  odd to think that many are people i don't even know.

but really, who does care...i don't even get comments.  i don't even know if you're reading or laughing or falling asleep. i know my stories are long...they're just stories...that i share with friends...stories that relate to others...or relate to our friends.
people don't have time.  people i'm related to don't even have time.  lots of friends don't have the time.  lots of friends aren't even computer literate.

when i started this blog...i thought it would be fun...a little something for friends and family and maybe extended friends and family to read...over a cup of coffee...over a cup of tea....just a quiet moment to think about the crazy days of life...crazy days of a mom with a teeny morsel of a sense of humor....a mom with feelings...a wife with a husband who makes me laugh...some trials and tribulations of life as a homeowner....a mom of teens and dogs and cats and fish...a friend.

i love it for me.  i love to write. i do question.  i wonder if i should bother.
lately, life has presented some challenges.  lots of little challenges.  lots more little ones.....one at a time....that seem draining.  very draining.  and exhausting.  sometimes overwhelming.

life is changing.  kids are growing. economy is challenging.  some family is no longer with us. 
i think to myself, as i write my little blog, why bother.  no one does read it....if  many friends don't follow, if many family members don't follow.....why bother.

"i write for me" my little voice inside me says. as i used to tell our little, little kids....that's the good angel with the good ideas.

but, there's another voice...it's there...haunting me as i write..."why bother, no one reads it!  if your own friends and family don't even check it out...who else would care.  why would anyone want to read this?"  maybe that's the bad angel on my shoulder...the one i use to tell our little, little kids to turn away.

but really, 28 followers....it is kind of pathetic...i write for me....i would tell my kids to keep writing.....it's not about the followers....that's just ego....what about writing for and from your heart, that's what matters....and then....the other bad angel.

i take lots of time to write. i do write from my heart. i guess that's what matters.  it's hard not to care.  i've been told i have thin skin...that's an understatement.

i think i'll keep going...doing...trying...
working...thinking...
creating...changing....

it may be time to change. maybe this is a blog just for me.  maybe i should have a different style if i want followers.  do followers matter?  it's kind of nice to feel that my blog is growing....but, really?
6 months and 28 followers. it's a tad embarrassing...i have more friends and family from kindergarten that i keep in touch with....i have more christmas cards to send than 28....i have more shoes.....more dust bunnies....maybe that's a sign.

the dust bunnies.  i could be cleaning up dust bunnies.  my house could have more attention.  i could do more artwork.  i could be selling more on e-bay!

and then, i'll never know.  i've only gotten about 10 comments on my blog....and that may be an overstatement.

just like anywhere else in life, it's nice to get approval...nice to get encouragement.  some friends are there...laughing and crying with me.  maybe, some family.

i used to write...and check out my followers...everyday they grew....it was exciting...it was energizing...to think i might be putting out some good...that might give others a chuckle...or laugh at themselves....we're all alot alike.

grace and i were talking...my blog doesn't offer much...it's not like i'm providing a service...i'm not offering helpful information...i have nothing to sell....just write...and tell about life...in my world....
who really cares?

 
you had me at hello!
all i needed to see was the beautiful blue doors with glass! when i see a store that is spectacular from a distance, it's calling my name out loud.  the store front seems to be beckoning, "come over here....look at me...i'm here for you....
woo hooo!" 

and off i go!  sometimes grace will feel the calling as well.....it's innate! we can't help the calling.  not everyone can hear that calling.....it's special!  it's a gift.  down through the generations....it's ours to have and to hold.

not always to hold and take home! sadly, we just have too much stuff....because some of our calling has become a curse.  just like too much of anything.....

moderation. "everything in moderation." was my mom's chant. no matter what the subject....diet....drinking....eating....
mayonnaise....butter.....salt.  you name it!

except, she really didn't know moderation when it came to shopping.  her own mother worked in some of the finer stores in massachusetts, where she was from. my grandmother did not know excess.  she was brought up with the finer things....yet she lived simply.

then she had a daughter....in 1924....i believe that's when my grandmother's shopping gene was triggered....and the calling began!

my mom had the calling from the get go!  to help it along, my grandfather used to take my mom with him summers while he traveled to see customers.  he was a salesman for general motors....

my grandfather would give my mom 25 cents to shop while she waited for him to make his sales calls. my mom, at 10 years old, that's where mom's shopping bonanzas began!



she loved everything to do with clothing and china.  hmmm... i wonder where i get that from!
and again, i'm thankful to e-bay for allowing us to move on...move on from this crazy excess!  the finer things are fabulous and well appreciated....only if we can find them!  

i love selling.  i love the thrill of the hunt.  it's been fun!  but after having so much "stuff" come to me from mom....stuff that we have saved from our own family....stuff that we hold onto for emotional sake......i'm done!  i'm letting it loose on the world!  if someone in turkey wants a camera that grace no longer uses, i'll fly it there....o.k.,  at least, the u.s. mail will deliver it for me!

so, i still love to shop.  the stores still call my name!  last week was a test run.  i carried no money.  we were in boston.  we were on newbury street!  i did it!  i stopped, i shopped....with grace right by my side.....loving everything there was to love....and we bought nothing! zero...zip...nada!
we were back in our south shore town...visiting....we bought no lacrosse tees, we bought no sailing tees.....from the town we love!  we took home our memories.

we were on cape cod.  we visited our favorite spots.  we stopped in our favorite towns.  we looked in windows.  we stopped in stores.
we took home memories.

there were a few moments....just a few ....where i had to white knuckle it....i needed support. biff was right there....shopping isn't his thing.  unless it's on e-bay. stores are a place for him to run in and run out!

last christmas, grace wanted a sweet anchor necklace from tiffany & co. she loves anchors. she loves tiffany.  a lovely gift. 

biff planned to swing by a local tiffany & co. after work.  after work and before his tiffany & co. adventure, he took a ten mile mountain bike ride.  he was pumped up...and looking like a mountain man! dirty from head to toe, sweaty and charming as ever.  he called the store ahead of time. he asked the saleswoman if they had the necklace in stock. indeed they did. he found parking, he ran into the spectacular mall, he sprinted to tiffany & co., he arrived at the store....even more sweaty...walked through the door...spoke to a saleswoman...gave her his information...thanked her for her fine service....sprinted back to his car and drove home.

as he drove home with the turquoise box and the pretty red ribbon, his cell phone rang.  he pulled over to pick it up. the caller on the other end was a representative from tiffany & co.  she was calling to see if he was satisfied with his service.

he was.  he was thrilled.  he was ecstatic. it wasn't about the whole shopping experience, about the selection and the decision making....it was the hit and run.  the joy and christmas cheer and spirit....of getting in and out of the whole shopping extravaganza at a mall, at a store.....in a grand total of 15 minutes.

biff doesn't have the calling. i think we're a good balance. thankfully.