i'm still here!  crazy week...lots of lasts...last grace lacrosse game...she scored a point!!! then, the team won by one point!! happy and so proud of her hard work.  it's been a big year of big and some tough transition getting momentum for freshman year...starting with mono...missed some school...lots of great social life...lots of learning and time management and hard work and new friends and lots of lessons learned by the kids in town.  a big year of growth...mentally, physically, emotionally...exhausted-ly!  love our girl.....and she loves us...NOT right now...we are the meanies...we have to set the rules....we are not a family democracy.....we love our kids like crazy....we're parents and we are learning as we go....we make life too hard....we like to laugh....we like to play....and then, we go and ruin it all by setting some boundaries!  we have had to really stay a united front this year.  high school is a whole new territory...for the kids and the parents.

a friend from montessori days sat next to me at freshman orientation....we talked about our kids...we both enjoy each others' children...we've all been together a long time...and we care...genuinely about our children and the other montessori graduates we (parents and children)......we compare notes....she has one older girl...and one younger boy....we parallel and we bump and we glide alongside each other.

we talked about the differences in parenting style.  we talked about the love of our kids. we talked about the pressures on our kids.  we talked about the old days.  we gabbed about our own lives and how we've grown...what we do while our kids are at school (eat bon bons....just like they suspect!)

while talking about the new life of teens and rules and hopes and dreams....as we sit at orientation....we spoke of the challenges and the tough job we have to keep putting up boundaries....some parents don't...so our boundaries have to be bigger and stronger....after all, this is only the beginning of high school....school hasn't even started!  

that's when i said, "wow!  those parents with no rules are really making my life incredibly difficult!  *&$%#@Q@#$$%^"

i continued, " i think we're pretty easy going parents and although we want to keep our kids in line, we want them to have some independence and learn their way.....only, when other parents don't set boundaries or stay on top of what's going on......"

lizza, my friend...seemingly new...although now it's been more than 10 years, looked at me with her big brown eyes and smiled....knowingly.....after all her daughter was two years older....back in the montessori days, that seemed like she was 10 years older! 

lizza looked at me, nodded... and with her hand made a sweeping motion towards the gathering of other nervous, confident yet insecure, bedraggled,   frazzled, overwhelmed, preoccupied, exhausted, proud, frustrated, hopeful, trusting, lost, dazed and confused parents...whose summer had also been cut short for this eager administration's subtle-y mandatory meeting to welcome us all....and as her hand slowly swept across her lap as if sweeping across the whole hustling, bustling, chattering, whispering parents...married, divorced, step-mothered, step-fathered, widowed, single, co-companioned, life partnered and caregivered parents ......with issues of dependencies and codependencies and alcoholisms and workholisms and rage-aholisms and fybromyalgia-isms and xanex-isms and prozac-isms and compulsively clean and organize-d and exercise-d and obsessive-compulsive disorder-d and gambler-anonymous-d and overeater anonymous-d and anorexic-d and neurotic-d and apathetic-d, anxiety-d and post traumatic stress disorder-d and emotionally distant and emotionally dependent and distracted and disturbed and polly-anna-d and put on a good face because my friends will wonder if my husband still lives with us, and look at my great hair and sandals and club shirt and vacation monogrammed and cell connected and politically connected and socially connected and mentally ill and hyperactive and a.d.d.-d and immature and uptight and relaxed and traumatized and denial-d and  well travelled and highly eduacated and under-educated and non-confrontational and in your face-tional and pregnant with the 10th child-d and artsy and intellectual and well-heeled and country clubb-d and beach club-d auditorum and she said,

"SEE ALL OF THE PARENTS IN THIS ROOM.....LOOK AROUND......LOOK AGAIN.....KEEP LOOKING..........................EVERY ONE OF THE PARENTS IN THIS ROOM WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL.....DO YOU REMEMBER THE DIFFERENT TYPES OF KIDS YOU KNEW IN HIGH SCHOOL??????????"

DRUGGIES, DRINKERS, PARTYERS, SLUTS,  PROM KINGS,  PROM QUEENS, HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEARTS, R.O.T.C.s, VOLUNTEER FIREFIGHTERS, THEATRE JUNKIES,  MATHLETES, DEBATERS, CON ARTISTS,  LOUD ONES, FUNNY ONES,  CLASS CLOWNS, THE MOST LIKELY TO SUCCEED, THE MOST POPULAR, FUNNIEST, WITH THE MOST SCHOOL SPIRIT, THE INTROVERTED, THE BEST DRESSED, THE  MOST OUTSPOKEN, THE CLOSETED, THE CONFUSED, THE  HAPPY, THE PEPPY, THE JOCKS,  THE NICE KIDS, THE DREAMER, THE SWEETEST, THE QUIET ONES, THE CHATTERBOXES, THE HONOR STUDENTS,  THE ROWDIES, THE  POT HEADS, THE CLASS CUTTERS, THE JUVENILE DELINQUENTS, THUGS, BEAUTY QUEENS, NERDS, AUDIO VISUAL GEEK SQUADDERS, GOTHS, ARTSY-FARTSIES, HIPPIES, BOHO, PREPPIES, CRUNCHY-GRANOLAS, , PRIMADONNAS, BOY SCOUTS, GIRL SCOUTS, FREAKS, PRANKSTERS, JOKERS, TROUBLEMAKERS, GRATEFUL DEAD-HEADS, THE EXCHANGE STUDENTS, THE  UPPERCLASSMEN, THE LOWERCLASSMEN, THE GYMNASTS, THE TOCKET SCIENTISTS, THE HEARTBROKEN, THE TEASERS, THE CLUELESS, THE UNDERDOGS, THE OVERSEXED, THE  DRAMATIC, THE  SICKLY, THE PATRIOTIC, THE BRAZEN, THE PONY TAILED, THE DOROTHY HAMILLED, THE CITY SLICKERS, THE COUNTRY BUMPKINS, THE CLASSY, THE TACKY, THE PATHETIC, THE ARROGANT, THE OBNOXIOUS, THE PROUD, THE FOCUSED, THE TATTLE TALERS, THE PIG TAILERS, THE MULLETEERS, THE BUZZIES, THE  SHORT, THE TALL, THE BLUE EYED, THE, BLONDES, THE BRUNETTES, THE DISHWATER BLONDES, THE ZIT-FACED, THE SHY, THE OUTGOING, THE  RAGGAMUFFINS, THE BROTHERS, THE SISTERS, THE WIMPS, THE BULLIES, THE GREEN EYED, THE FRECKLED, THE BROWN NOSERS, DREAMERS, SPACE CASES,  WILD,  DRAMATIC, LIARS, CHEATERS,INTELLECTUALS, SPACE CADETS, MAJORETTES, CHEERLEADERS, TOUGH GUYS, PHYSICAL EDDIES AND EDWINAS AND ALL OF THE REST THAT WE MAY HAVE LEFT OUT!

OH, BY THE WAY......NOW THEY ARE THE PARENTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AND ANOTHER THING....THAT WAS JUST GRACE....I HAVEN'T EVEN GOTTEN TO T.J. AND HIS WEEK, MONTH, YEAR AND FUTURE.


AHHHHH.....JUST ANOTHER DAY EATING BON BONS! 

MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITES!

SOUPY SALES.  I WAS ABOUT 4 YEARS OLD WHEN I SAW THAT SHOW.  MY BROTHERS WATCHED THE SHOW.  I CAN STILL REMEMBER GOING TO BED ONE NIGHT AT ABOUT 4 YEARS OLD AND BEGGING, PLEADING WITH MY BROTHER TO WRITE SOUPY SALES A FAN LETTER!!  WHY I SO DESPERATELY NEEDED HIM TO KNOW THAT I WAS A FAN!!

LUCILLE BALL  I LOVE LUCY...MY FAVE AND MOSTLY HOW I HAVE BASED MY LIFE...SHE MADE ME LAUGH FROM A VERY EARLY AGE.  I WAS ENTHRALLED WITH LUCY FROM THE BEGINNING.  SHE MADE ME LAUGH.  SHE GOT INTO CRAZY SITUATIONS WITH HER BFF ETHEL!  SHE WAS MY MOST AWESOME ENTERTAINMENT AT A YOUNG AGE.

CAROL BURNETT WAS MY IDOL.  I WROTE LETTERS TO HER AND I WANTED TO SEND MY PICTURE FROM OUR GIRL SCOUT ART SHOW. MY ART WORK WAS "THE GIRL SCOUT" .....IT WAS MY CRAYON "WORK"....INSPIRED BY THE GIRL SCOUT ON THE CAROL BURNETT SKIT!  I LOVED EVERYTHING ABOUT HER.  I WANTED TO BE HER. I WANTED TO MEET HER.  I REALLY THOUGHT THAT SHE SHOULD KNOW ME.  I THOUGHT SHE WOULD BE THRILLED TO MEET ME! I WANTED TO BE ON THE SHOW!  SHE CHANGED ME AND HOW I SAW LIFE.  I REALIZED HOW HUMOR HELPED EVERYONE TO LIGHTEN UP...IN GOOD TIMES AND BAD!  I LOVED HER SLAPSTICK.  I LOVED HER SWEETNESS AND ZANYNESS AND THE LAUGHTER SHE BROUGHT TO US ALL! I CRIED WHEN HER SHOW ENDED.

I LOVED MARY TYLER MOORE....THROWING THE HAT UP IN THE AIR.  I WANTED HER JOB...WHEN I GREW UP.  I LOVED HER FRIENDS AND THE PEOPLE SHE WORKED WITH.....TO ME, SHE WAS THE ULTIMATE WORKING WOMAN!

MARLO THOMAS IN "THAT GIRL"..."DIAMONDS, DAISIES, SNOWFLAKES, THAT GIRL!"  SHE WAS MY LITTLE GIRL DREAM OF BEING GROWN UP.  SHE LIVED THE ULTIMATE LIFE.  SHE LOVED DONALD HOLLINGER.  SHE HAD HER OWN MIXUPS.  I STILL REMEMBER HER APARTMENT.  WHILE SEEMINGLY GLAMOROUS, WHEN SHE PULLED UP HER SHADES IN THE LIVING ROOM, WE SAW EXPOSED BRICK!  I STILL REMEMBER WHEN SHE WENT BOWLING (A GLAMOROUS DATE, INDEED!).....SHE GOT HER BIG TOE STUCK IN A BOWLING BALL!

THE FIRST BIG MUSEUM EVENT THAT I CAN REMEMBER WAS VINCENT VAN GOGH AT THE BROOKLYN MUSEUM OF ART!  THANKFULLY, MY MOM HAD SOME REASON THAT SHE WAS MOVED TO TAKE ME TO THAT SPECIAL EVENT.  HIS ARTWORK AND HIS STORY MOVED ME.  AT THAT TIME, I WAS BLOWN AWAY THINKING ABOUT VAN GOGH AND WHERE HE HAD COME FROM AND THE WORK HE DID....MAYBE IT'S BECAUSE OF HIM AND HIS WORK, "THE BEDROOM" THAT INSPIRED MY LOVE OF CLOGS!  BACK THEN, I HAD NO OTHER EXPOSURE TO THAT KIND OF LIFE....OR LIVING.  THERE WAS NO INTERNET,  T.V. OR PHOTOGRAPHY THAT HAD CARRIED ME TO ANOTHER PLACE.

MRS. D.,  OUR FAMILY FRIEND.  SHE TAUGHT ME HOW TO READ.  SHE WAS A FIRST GRADE TEACHER.  NOT MINE.  SHE WAS A MOM WITH 3 BOYS.  MY PARENTS WERE FRIENDS BECAUSE OF MY BROTHERS' FRIENDSHIPS WITH THEIR SONS.  SHE JUST LOVED ME AND MADE ME FEEL LOVED!  SHE LOVED JUST HAVING A GIRL AROUND! SHE SHOWED ME A RESPECT AND LOVE FROM A YOUNG AGE.  JUST GOOD LOVE.  OUTSIDE OF MY OWN FAMILY.  AND.....SHE TAUGHT ME TO READ...ON THEIR LIVING ROOM COUCH!  SHE WAS THERE IN THAT MOMENT WHERE IT TOOK OFF!  ANOTHER GIFT.

MONROE.  THE GOLDEN RETRIEVER WHO CHANGED MY LIFE.  FOREVER.  MONROE MADE A DIFFERENCE IN MY LIFE....MONROE TAUGHT ME AND I TAUGHT MONROE....TO BRING A LEASH!  A DOG THAT GAVE ME SO MUCH!  BECAUSE OF  MONROE, I HAVE GOLDEN RETRIEVERS!

I'VE NEVER MET MY CAROL BURNETT.  I'VE READ ABOUT HER. I STILL DREAM OF MEETING HER!

I NEVER MET LUCY, BUT WE DID GET TO JAMESTOWN, N.Y. AND I DRAGGED THE WHOLE FAMILY INTO HER MUSEUM!

SOUPY SALES JUST DIED AWHILE BACK.  I'LL GET OVER IT.  HE WAS A PASSING PHASE...YET HE MADE ME LAUGH. WHO KNOWS WHY.  I LOVED HIS FUNNY VOICES, I KNOW THAT.

"THAT GIRL" I NEVER GOT A CHANCE TO MEET!  I DID GET TO MEET MARLO THOMAS.  SHE SPOKE AT A COLLEGE GRADUATION...NOT MY CLASS....BUT, THE PRESIDENT OF THE COLLEGE KNEW HOW MUCH WE LOVED HER...HE INVITED A SELECT GROUP OF ADMIRERS (MY FRIENDS!) TO MEET WITH HER AND HAVE HIS PHOTOGRAPHER TAKE PICTURES....OF MARLO WITH US!!! WE WERE BABBLING AND RAMBLING AND SMILING AND GIGGLING. NOT MUCH MOVING CONVERSATION BUT VERY MOVED TO MEET SUCH A GO GETTER IN THE WOMAN'S MOVEMENT.  A DIFFERENT GENERATION.

I NEVER MET MARY TYLER MOORE.  I THINK SHE WAS HUGE TO ME AT THE TIME OF HER SHOW....IT WAS THE SHOW I LOVED AND THE HUMOR AND THE FUNNY GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO WORKED AT WJ......MARY WAS FUN....BUT IT WAS THE GROUP I LOVED!

PRINCESS DIANA/LADY DIANA.....THE FIRST PRINCESS OF OUR AGE RANGE.  SHE MARRIED AROUND MY COLLEGE YEARS.  SHE HAD STYLE...WHILE BRITISH AND ROYAL FAMILY STUFFED, SHE STILL HAD STYLE.  I ENJOYED THAT!  SHE WAS FUN TO WATCH.  NOT OBSESSIVELY, JUST INTERESTED, IF HER PHOTOS POPPED UP.  ALTHOUGH, I DID ATTEND A BIG NEW YORK CITY BLACK TIE EVENT WHILE SHE WAS IN THE U.S.A.

WE SAW AN OPERA AT THE BROOKLYN ACADEMY OF ARTS AND A TWINKLING AND DELIGHTFUL DINNER AT THE WINTER GARDEN,BATTERY PARK CITY,N.Y.C. .  HER DRESS WAS SPECTACULAR AS WELL AS HER SMILE CITY.

I SAW HER AGAIN ON ONE OF THOSE LITTLEMARYMIXUP MOMENTS WHILE IN LONDON...REALLY WINDSOR....AND IT WAS WONDERFUL.  

VAN GOGH CHANGED MY LIFE AND MY CRAVING TO VISIT ART MUSEUMS.  HIS COLORS AND HIS STYLE MADE A DIFFERENCE IN THE WAY I LOOKED AT ART .....FOREVER.

SO MANY MORE.  LOTS OF FAVORITES...LOTS AND LOTS. BUT THESE ARE SOME OF MY FIRST FAVES...THAT I REMEMBER.

Teach Your Children

sorry to have so many "mixups" in blog land. it seems that while i have something that i love doing, this is the season of ends of this and ends of that and more of this and more of that! lacrosse games, lacrosse picnics, concerts, events of all kinds.....something for everyone...everywhere! someone...somewhere.once again...it's always something.  thank you gilda radner.

a whirlwind of a weekend has led us into a whirlwind of a monday.  it's true.  what have i done?  where have i gone?  when have i done it?  why have we done it, all of us?

whirlwind.  that pretty much explains it. friends we love have kids we love graduating college at this time of year, reminding us of the exciting time in our lives.  we have other friends with kids graduating high school.....WOW!   i just realized...this moment ....that 2, count 'em 2 of my God Children are graduating high school.  YIKES!

3 of my God Children ###3!

3 sweet girls.  all born the same year.  all with different hopes and dreams....goals and plans....styles and attitudes.  michaela is a middle child. molly is the youngest of four children.  emily is the first of two children.

Does that matter?  maybe.  it's interesting to see who people become.  nature vs. nurture. does the birth order really factor into who we are.  i think so! just sayin'. 

one girl loves drama.  not just day to day drama.  just drama.  the  smiling, singing, dancing and on stage all day, all night, lullaby of broadway kind of drama!  that's a firstborn. WOW!  i believe in her.  i believe she can accomplish anything she sets out to do!  i also believe that life has serendipitous events that lead us through life.  it's a big world. it's all out there for us....where do we run with it?  or where will she run with it.  if she runs, how far will she go?  how far will she want to go?  the morning of her christening, we played the music to "sister act" whoopi goldberg....

emily elizabeth's mom and dad loved the movie....her mom and dad loved the music....her mom and dad loved their baby....her mom and dad loved all of us....but, baby emily was crying and crying and crying on the morning of her christening.  that's what got us bouncing and bumping and singing and rocking and dancing with the itty bitty baby girl the hours before her christening!  

did that song have anything to do with her future in drama, music, singing, dancing, rocking, rolling and more?  maybe.  i'd like to think that biff and i are responsible for her.....oh wait!  that would be thanks to emily's mom and dad!  i rocked and rolled and did some song and dance....but, it wasn't quite what her parents did to encourage her and see her through all of the years that led her up to college admission at a fine school, as a student of drama, music and dance.
 
she is a sweet and loving and beautiful curly haired, green eyed, smiling, giggling star...and i wished her only the biggest dreams on the day of her christening.  i had my own dreams for that baby of one of my very best friends!  i still have those dreams.  big.  very big.  i wish for her happiness.  i want her to have a life filled with family and friends and love surrounding her.....always.  oh, she can become a hollywood starlet or a dance teacher or sell videos with movie stars.....my wish for her is the same.  i wish for her to live out her dreams as they unfold....one by one...day by day.



michaela, a middle child, was baptized on a cold  winter morning surrounded by  loving family with lots of wonderful wishes for her.  I whispered my own wishes for her life and all good things for her future.  of course, i had dreams of me being a guiding force in her life.  as life takes twists and turns, my love for her was always deep yet distance and circumstance kept us less than close.  in spirit, i sent love and i still dream big for her....and since we are not so close, distance wise or family connection wise, my dreams are out there for her!  they are dreams i wish for her that she may never know.  i have loved her and wished good things for her from the moment i saw her....after a six hour drive....and delight at the sound of her name. she knows i love her.  she know that i care.  our days are not filled with the greatest connection, but the love is there.  my dream for her is the same....only different!  i wish for her to follow her dreams.  i dream for her to listen to what matters....i dream for her to listen to her heart and follow her dreams. my dreams for michaela are big yet simple!  i wish her the greatest love and  lots of joy for the simple things in life.  i dream that she will always know what matters!   that's love...always.  now, that's big.

molly is the youngest of thte four girls in her family.  with 3 girls before her, molly knew her place!  the last shall be first!  molly shared the love of her parents and lots of family and friends....and lots of hand me down dresses!  with her go with the flow sweetness and gentle ways, molly learned at an early age that being number one could come easily if she could tough it out!  she's beautiful and soft spoken and carries a big stick!  that's her smarts!  she is bright and articulate and humble and her attributes will have her shining whether in 3 sisters' shadows or on her favorite beach.  i dream  of action and fun and kindness and gentleness...for the sweet little girl inside!  i rocked her and held her and loved her from the moment we met.  always, the last of the little ducklings....but molly always stood out....she made sure of that!  she is her own person...strong in heart and in character and mind.  My dreams for molly are simple.....to stand tall and proud and take chances and dare to be more than she can imagine....and know that her sweet ways will carry her stick.  molly is on her way to great things....and molly will stay true to herself and move on her dreams....molly will make them happen...that's molly...she gets it done.

dreams are important.  they keep us moving towards a goal...and the goals change....sometimes daily....sometimes hourly...sometimes with small children, by the minute! 

it's fabulous to feel that others share our dreams.  it's exciting to share our dreams.  it's a miracle when  we have someone to share our dreams with...that is the blessing i wish for all....not that one's life goal is to meet someone to share dreams....that's the greatest gift i've gotten.  after all of the fabulous hopes and dreams and plans and loves and goals and fun and singing and dancing and thinking and doing ........that's the bonus!  that's the bonus that may come along....in the midst of the goals and thinking and dreaming and singing and fun and thinking and dancing and doing!


my wish for each one of them is the same. dream. plan. set goals. stay strong. dream big. never give up. never give up. never give up.  wish......wish for more and plan.  sometimes hopes turn out better than we plan! that's my wish for each sweet and strong girl.....young woman. 



life takes twists. turns. ins. outs. ups. downs. curves. dreams.....DREAM BIG!

Devil Dogs...partners in crime.

That's Fitzy!  That's her Nose.  Nobody nose the trouble I've seen, nobody nose like Daisy! 

Daisy is eight years old now!  Fitzy has been with us since Daisy was five and a half.  Fitzy was only one year old.  How sweet! 

Sweet for who?  All  of us actually.  Daisy is loyal as the day is long.  Fitzy is hungry as the day is long.
We feed her.  We feed Daisy.  Well.

As a puppy, Daisy was well fed, like clock work...with love.  Mostly, we all gave her praise in the form of love and attention and lots of heavy petting!  Life was good for Daisy.

She herded our kittens, she met the kids at the school bus..."where are the kids?" would have her running to the bus.  She was obedient and well mannered.  The only thing that got our sweet Daisy in trouble was her enthusiasm and loyalty! 






She would get on the school bus occasionally....she was always eager to learn...it's no wonder!  As a puppy, she went to Montessori....she was there for circle time at the end of the day and she was T.J's "sharing".....she was only a a few months old....and even then her school attendance record was five star....with praises from the teacher and she got along well with the other kids.

She came everywhere with me.  She came everywhere with us as a family.  She attended the kids' baseball games and wore team shirts....(Grace made sure that she was always well accessorized!)....and hats.  She went to soccer games.  She went to Lacrosse Games throughout Connecticut.  She's been to sleepovers at friends' houses.  She's been to late night parties and barbeques.  She has been to meetings of all kinds.

Everyone knows Daisy....everyone loves her.  We can count on her and her loving ways.  She stays up late to wait for everyone to be tucked in.  She has her own special bark to let us know that one of the kitties are outside and need to come in for the night.  She stays on duty if Biff is out of town.  She checks on the kids before she sleeps by my side of the bed.   She does lots of extra duty. 

She had many trips to Long Island...to visit family.  She stayed at Gramma's while we all went to the pool...including Gramma.  She stayed with our family friends.....the family who shared their Golden Retriever, Monroe, with me and the reason I ached for my own Golden.  She kept them company while I visited my mom in the hospital.  She always accompanied me to Fairfield University to visit my niece, her cousin.  She's stayed up late studying with her cousin, Claire.....oh!  she's Grace and T.J.'s cousin too.  She's been to beaches everywhere.  She made friends with the ice cream man in town....who drives with his own loving Golden on board.  

Life is still good for Daisy.  Just different.  

Fitzy, Fitz, Fitzgerald....we love her too.  Just as every child is different and has their own individual spirit and style, our dogs do too.  Fitzy didn't have the same start in life.  While a Golden through and through, she didn't get the same puppy time as daisy.  She lived with a family with four children...under six.  She was always crated....not the same way as Daisy who loved her safety of her crate...it was her own niche....it was her haven...it was her home.  Fitzy was locked up.  Jailed in her crate.  We don't think she was served meals....rather, she jumped for food tossed from high chairs.  We think her meals were a challenge.   

Enter Fitzgerald....to our home.  Adorable.   Sweet.  With "needs", the family told us.  She just needs more than we can offer, the third family who had her for a week told us.  The first family had 4 kids.  The second family was different.  it was a woman who ran a day care....not much time to train her....certainly a bit chaotic for her...only a puppy, with day care needs of her own.  The third family was an empty nester couple with a well mannered dog of their own....they worked all day...Fitzy needed more than they could give her.....

They came to introduce us.  A dog friend of mine had heard we were thinking of a second.  She had these folks call me.  It was August.  We were home from The Cape.  The woman said if we didn't take her she would have to call Yankee Golden Retriever Rescue to try and find her a home.

Adorable.  That face.  That soft fur.  That sweet smile.  That eager look.  That need...she had to be saved.   We were the ones.  We could make a difference!

Biff said, "But....will she be a Marley?"  No, I told him.  We can train her.  She just needs attention.  She just needs time.

True.  That's just what she needs....still.  Adorable. That face.  That soft fur.  That smile.  That eager look.  That need...............she still needs.

FOOD.  always.  anyway.  anyhow.  anyplace.  anywhere.  FOOD.  Motivation is food.  Food is motivation.  

When motivation isn't food, Fitz is motivated by love....rather, needy for love.  Lots of love.....lots and lots of love.  More love. Lots more love.  Lots and lots, more and more LOVE.

Daisy needs love ......as a reward.  Fitzy needs love.....always.....and, did I mention she has a few separation issues.  She could and would be a lap dog if we let her.  She would be in between Biff and I at night...if we even let her upstairs.....she would probably take the best pillow....and roll on the most fluffy of comforters.  This dog, Fitz, has needs.  BIG NEEDS.

I see a little bit of me in both dogs.......o.k.  probably lots and lots of me......lots and lots and lots of me.

Only I don't leave my family for food. Any food. Anywhere.  Anytime.  Anyhow.

Maybe for lipstick, but certainly not food.  T.J. tells a story.....We were walking into Kate's house for Easter....Kate is like my sister....one of my best friends of my life......since college......forever......as we walked to the door that Easter Sunday, I said, "WAIT!  Where's my lipstick?  I need my lipstick!"  Biff, Grace and T.J. all answered, "Just go in!"......apparently, in my moment of hysteria....me, without lipstick upon entry!....i did say, "NO LIPSTICK?  I would sell my children for lipstick!".........those words have been tossed back to me ever since.   O.K., maybe a lipstick, but not food.

Daisy has many stories.  Some of her stories are about running laps.....never for food. I don't even think she has ever eaten a lipstick.  She sits for a treat, sure.....but she wouldn't sit for a lipstick!

 

And then there's Fitz, the other dog I love so much...actually, we all do.....it's just different.  Always different.

 

She is always up for a good meal.

 

Biff used to do a stop, drop and roll set up....to get  stolen food away from Fitz....only it was more of a RUN, SLIDE, TACKLE, SLIDE!  oh, it was exciting all right, just a tad disruptive during dinner.  We began to question who was the crazy one....Fitzy or Biff?

Biff has come a long way since then.  So has Fitz.  Actually, Fitz isn't able to have food near her.....ever....unless it's hers.  Nevermind teaching her to "LEAVE IT!"...been there....she didn't do that.....o.k. maybe one time....or two.....just never when she is already in the process of eating....a marshmallow, a lipstick, a shrimp, cups of yogurt,a shell, a sock, a Starbucks coffee,  a Dunkin Donut's coffee, a water, an orange juice, butter, a bag of fresh bagels or cup of coffee at home.  

 

She has taken lunch from two big guys eating at the beach....innocently sitting on the porch of the old red abandoned beach house.......they looked like they didn't know what hit them...as i grovelled, they were so stunned, they just smiled and said not to worry.  They were in shock, surely they had never seen anyone or anything the speed of Fitz on a mission.......

She has taken Biff's dinner off the table as he pivoted to get his water.

She has eaten a whole quiche from Whole Foods  while en route home from the store.

She has eaten our corn and fruit on our way home from our local farmstand.

She has had my morning coffee.

She has had our cereal.

She has eaten so many Burt's Bees Lipsticks that I began to think she was honestly using them as breath freshener.

She has run through our neighbors' house in quest of food. 

She has run to another neighbors house for the barbeque....and gone in the door to look for more....they thought it was "Cute"....so she keeps trying to go back.

She has gone to another neighbors' house and jumped in the gramma's fancy car with the grandchildren to eat up some fallen cheerios.....that neighbor didn't even like dogs....now I'm sure she's scarred for life.

She has gone to another neighbor, up the road, and had to have a ride home....since she had no leash....she left that home!

She ran off at the beach to follow the scent of some senior citizens little cocktail hour, with civilized wine and cheese and scotch and sodas and vodka and tonics and lots of chips and cheetos and.........not for long!  Even with the name Fitzgerald, apparently drinking doesn't interest her.....but the crackers and cheese and cheetos and fritos did!  All I can remember, is the $#&*)&^%&#$^&$())_&*&%^&$#@#@ that came from the distinguished looking gentleman's mouth......I cried on the way back to the car.

She began to run after our other neighbors' chickens, which caused Daisy to run towards the chickens to stop Fitzy from going after the chickens and caused the neighbors, our friends (although tested many times) to run out after their chickens and our dogs...creating a little chaos on an otherwise quiet morning.

She has gotten us  kicked out of my mom's nursing home.

And there's more.

Just Friday, I took Daisy and Fitzy to the Farmer's Market, on the town green.  I had already taken some wonderful greens to the car.  The market was wrapping up for the day, music still playing....it was winding down.  I had both dogs leashed.  Too bad for Daisy as she doesn't usually need a leash.  I had to keep Fitz from tugging.  She had lots to smell.  SNIFF.  SNIFF. tug...tug...tug....tugggggg. Finally, I sat down with them.  Fitz was draped across my legs. Daisy sat proudly at my side.  Nice.  This is how I could finally teach Fitz.....every week at the Farmer's Market...she would learn ....just by the exposure....even if a little late in her life....this could be the thing to help!

That's when the fisherman from Stonington tossed an empty clam shell across the lawn.  Fitz jumped up and ran towards the shell....Daisy followed....to check up ....or cash in on the find.......I held tight.  I had the leash.....barking Daisy.....rolling and "summersalting" along....they got to the empty clamshell.  

We had gathered a crowd!  A thank you to the fisherman was all he needed to be encouraged to toss a couple more.

Then we walked to the car...quietly.  People stopped to pet the adorable smiling dogs.  I waited at the car for T.J. to meet me......he had been  

"laxin' " with friends...he was having a little stick time with some lacrosse friends and was on his way to the car.  Friends stopped to chat.  They petted the dogs. We talked.  We petted.

The dogs and I sat quietly at the back of the car with the rear open...listening to the last of the music...people watching.  That's when T.J and his friend arrived.....hungry.  As we talked about food, Fitz jumped out of the car and began laps around the last of the market  and the folks at the end......laps and laps....running and running more laps.  T.J. was off and running after.  I ran.  Daisy ran....and finally, T.J. did the famous tackle...the family version of stop, drop and roll.  He did the run, jump, slide, tackle and slide version......and he caught our Fitz!  

The boys went to the pizza shop for dinner. The dogs and I drove home.  Maybe it would take some more time for Fitz to learn.  Surely, it was taking us time to be trained.  

 

I fed Daisy and Fitzy.  Again.

Now the pair work together.  Fitz makes a mad dash for the food.  Daisy barks to send us an alert.  While we reprimand Fitzy, Daisy scouts the area to see if there's anything that Fitz might have missed!  WAIT!  Our innocent little Daisy....well, it's hard to be the good one all of the time!

Devil Dogs...partners in crime!

i am technologically challenged today....i am sorry that i am just not getting this stuff...it may take a little while...thanks for understanding

post office with e-bay

the other day i took a little video while taking care of some of my e-bay mailings....this is a big deal in my life.  not the e-bay. not the packaging. not the selling.  not the customers. not the addressing.  the actual post office trip.  i've written about this before...it's all about the karma...i thought i would take you with me....just cuz.  off we go.

click the link below if you want to go with me....

http://qik.com/video/6592598

things that made a difference along the way!

museums - cabanas -

city - driver's license - - new york city -babies

-sail -  crayola crayons -

-ice skate - daydreams-

-sing on stage - church -
- bicycles - family -

-college - crazy bosses

-ski- new york city - -saks fifth avenue - dogs - boston -  art - ocean - magic markers -  hiking - jog strollers -  kittens - laughing -  family - 

-biff - europe -travel
-art lessons - polliwog pond - kindergarten
- friends - teachers-

- cape cod -summers -
languages - moves - singing - outward bound - broadway shows - school plays - creativity - small towns - big cities - kids - just some things -on and on and on and on and on!

what a day!  up and atom and on the go!  today was an e-bay day! work...work...work! and lots of fun. 

i survived another day at the post office.  for most, that's no accomplishment to even mention.  for me, it's a heroic act of bravery!  it takes a hero to make it to the post office with 8 packages, packed nicely, addressed, carried the hefty load to the car with the 2 golden retrievers frolicking all the way. 

one coffee from starbucks...that fitzy found to be a  mid afternoon pick me up, managed to drink without spilling a drop on my fabulous e-bay  merchandise. oh, she did spill but, what coffee she did spill, daisy managed to quickly slurp it up! 

and that's just before i left the driveway.

as i was backing down the driveway, t.j. came running after me...he was desperate for some danon gogurt...

he just had some sort of lisping device put into his mouth at the orthodontist this morning....it was imperative. it was the only thing he could eat.  he traded his whole lunch for a gogurt today...just to have something...anything....any  morsel.  

quite a bit on my plate for a woman with post office issues.  i was determined. i had lots to get in the mail.  after t.j.'s desperate plea, i hit the gas and made a break for it!

i got over the first hurdle smoothly.  there was parking right outside of the post office. 

while i had the immediate packages all set to go, there were some that i was hoping to send on their way once i found the right size boxes.  that's what i tossed and tangled with outside of the post office...i had tissue paper and bubble wrap and new address stickers and markers....while the doggies looked over my shoulder....fitzy eager to grab another cuppa joe.

have no fear! i managed to get into the building just in time for the long 5 o'clock line!  the woman postal worker didn't even scold me for slipping in the door at the last minute....like she had done on friday...which further scarred me and caused some postal customer shame.  I managed to carry my slippery envelopes and tumbling boxes to the counter to ship out.

in just a few moments, i was skipping out the door.  another day at the office...the post office.

happy mother's day!

lots of good wishes,

littlemarymixup

LOVE THAT PINK!

MOM'S COLOR THAT WE ALL KNOW AND LOVE...JUST LIKE MOM!  I LEARNED ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF LIPSTICK A AN EARLY AGE!  MOM USED TO SAY,"WELL, I JUST THOUGHT IF I HAD MY  LIPSTICK ON, IT WOULD BE NICER FOR DADDY TO SEE ME IN THE MORNING!"  AND THAT'S HOW IT WAS...FOREVER AND EVER...AMEN!

LOVE THAT PINK BY REVLON FOREVER AND EVER AMEN.

TIL THE END....

NOT KIDDING!

WELL, FIRST OF ALL, I WAS BORN INTO AN IRISH CATHOLIC FAMILY! MY MOM TOOK THAT SERIOUSLY. WEDDINGS, WAKES AND FUNERALS....THAT'S US!  WEDDINGS, WAKES AND FUNERALS WERE A HIGHLIGHT OF LIFE!  FAMILY GET TOGETHERS AND ALWAYS A CELEBRATION! 

WEDDINGS! CHECK!

WAKES!         CHECK!

FUNERALS!   CHECK!

SO, THAT'S WHY I WANT YOU TO KNOW THIS LITTLEMARYMIXUP STORY....I THINK YOU ALREADY KNOW HOW MUCH I MISS MY MOM AND WISH SHE WAS HERE THIS MORNING HAVING DONUTS AND COFFEE!

ACTUALLY, MOM WOULD LOVE THIS STORY AND I THINK THAT SHE'D BE PROUD OF ME....BECAUSE I LOVED HER SO MUCH THAT I DID THE RIGHT THING!  EVEN THOUGH IT WAS A TAD UNCOMFORTABLE TO TAKE CARE OF AND UNCONVENTIONAL FOR A WAKE...FOR MY OWN MOM!

IT WAS JUST 2 YEARS AGO.  ALTHOUGH IT WAS THE SADDEST OF TIMES, IT WAS THE HAPPIEST OF TIMES!  IT WAS AN IRISH WAKE...AND ALL OF OUR OLDEST FRIENDS AND FAMILY AND LOTS OF OTHER PEOPLE WHO LOVED MOM SO MUCH WERE THERE!  THE ROOM WAS FILLED WITH LOVE AND MEMORIES AND GREAT STORIES AND LAUGHS AND TEARS AND SWEETNESS.  I FELT LIKE MOM SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE TOO!

WAIT, SHE WAS!  IN SPIRIT AND IN BODY...OPEN CASKET IRISH.  I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT CATHOLICS WERE SO INTO THAT.  I UNDERSTAND THAT IN THE OLD DAYS IN IRELAND, THEY HAD THE LOVED ONE IN THE LIVING ROOM AND WHEN THE DRINKS WERE POURING AND THE MEMORIES WERE ROARING, THERE WAS DANCING AND SINGING AND FUN.  IT GOT SO CRAZY THAT THEY HAD TO STAND THE BODY AGAINST THE WALL TO MAKE ROOM FOR THE DANCING!

IN THE LAST 10 YEARS OF MOM'S LIFE, WHEN BIFF ASKED MOM HOW SHE WAS, SHE WOULD SAY, "OH, I'M ALWAYS TROTTIN' UP TO FAIRCHILD'S THESE DAYS!"  THAT WAS TRUE.  FAIRCHILD'S WAS THE LOCAL FUNERAL HOME WHERE EVERYBODY WHO IS ANYBODY GOES....EVENTUALLY!  MOM AND HER FRIENDS WOULD COME BACK AFTER AN "EVENT" AND THEY'D SAY, "OH, SHE LOOKED BEAUTIFUL...THEY DID SUCH A GREAT JOB!  JUST LOVELY."

IT WAS MOM'S MOMENT!  I HATED THAT PART.  I APPROACHED THE OPEN CASKET WITH BIFF AND THE KIDS.... TO KNEEL DOWN AND SAY A PRAYER.  AS WE WERE KNEELING, IN THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT OF MY LIFE, AND WHILE I WAS BEGINNING TO TEAR UP, AT THAT MOMENT....I REALIZED SOMETHING THAT MOM WOULD NEVER HAVE ALLOWED...........HER LIPSTICK WAS THE WRONG COLOR!  AND TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE, HER INFAMOUS STYLE WAS LACKING.....HER ST. JOHN KNIT THAT SHE HAD SAVED FOR A BIG EVENT....THIS ONE....LOVELY AS THAT WAS......SHE HAD NO PEARLS AND JEWELS THAT WAS HER TRADEMARK!

SHE WOULD HAVE DIED!

THAT WAS WHEN MY SISTERLIKE FRIEND FROM COLLEGE ARRIVED.  SHE WAS THERE TO SAY A PRAYER....SHE WANTED ME TO BE THERE WITH HER....OF COURSE.

WHILE WE WERE UP "WITH MOM," PATSY AND I TALKED...OF COURSE, WE TALKED ABOUT HER STYLE...AND THE TROUBLE WITH HER ACCESSORIES AND EVEN WORSE!  HER LIPSTICK WAS MORE LIKE MOVIE QUEEN MAUVE RATHER THAN "LOVE THAT PINK!"

JUST THEN, MY FABULOUS SISTER IN LAW, CARY, MOTIONED TO ME....SHE HAD THE JEWELRY.  PATSY WENT OVER TO CARY AND GRABBED THE "INSTANT STYLE"......PATSY AND I WHISPERED AND MADE OUR PLAN....WE HAD TO.... WE RIGGED AND JIMMIED AND ADJUSTED AND PLACED HER JEWELRY AND HID ALL OF THE CLASPS.....WE HAD TO BE DISCREET....PEOPLE WERE THERE...TO "VISIT"......

WE GOT HYSTERICAL...WE HAD TEARS IN OUR EYES...APPROPRIATE MAYBE, BUT THE TEARS WEREN'T FOR SADNESS...WE HAD THAT KIND OF NERVOUS LAUGHTER THAT WE'VE HAD  IN CHURCH FOREVER.....SHAKING AND LAUGHING....LAUGHING AND SHAKING!   JUST LIKE MARY TYLER MOORE WHEN CHUCKLES THE CLOWN DIED!  TAKE A SECOND TO ENJOY THIS YOU TUBE VIDEO....MY MOM AND I LOVED IT!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwC361O13gk

WE DID IT.  LIPSTICK WAS NOT SOMETHING I WOULD ATTEMPT....DEAD OR ALIVE.....I WAS ABLE TO SPEAK TO THE WOMAN IN CHARGE....WITHIN MINUTES, LOVE THAT PINK WAS ON! WE WERE READY FOR THE PARTY. LIPSTICK AND PEARLS.  CHECK.

ON THAT NOTE, THERE WE WERE...ONE LAST "PARTY" FOR MOM!  O.K. THAT'S AN EXAGGERATION!  IT WASN'T THAT FESTIVE.  JUST KIND OF FESTIVE....TALKING AND TELLING STORIES AND FAMILY AND FRIENDS.

MOM WAS DRESSED FOR HER PARTY!  BEST OF ALL, SHE HAD HER LIPSTICK ON...LOVE THAT PINK! SHE WENT OUT IN HER STYLE!  SHE HAD ON HER LIPSTICK....FOR DAD!!

STILL....TO THIS DAY.....PATSY AND CARY AND I HAVE OUR LITTLE SECRET....WE DID IT FOR MOM!  AND FOR ALL OF HER FRIENDS...WHO WOULD GO HOME WITH THEIR FRIENDS AND SAY, "SHE LOOKED LOVELY, DIDN'T SHE!"

AND OF COURSE, "FITZGERALD", "FITZ" WAS NAMED AFTER MOM.....BECAUSE WE ALL THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUN....BESIDES FITZ WAS BEAUTIFUL......DAD ALWAYS CALLED MOM "FITZ"!  MOM GOT A KICK OUT OF IT!  IT'S IRONIC THAT FITZY THE DOG  ALWAYS GOES FOR MY LIPSTICK....REVLON, BURTS BEES, COVER GIRL, L'OREAL......LIKE MOM, SHE JUST LOVES HER LIPSTICK!

prepnextdoor is a little blog that i've started.  it came to be while i was out shopping with grace and kaitlin.  the photos became a fun little game for me while the girls were on their own, gaining just a little independence....

i walk through stores all of the time and think about the possibilities everyone has....at any income...starting out....on a budget.....spending money on rent in new york city, boston or any city....just thinking...and how my mom would love this....we talked about our finds all of the time...we shopped together....we talked about shopping long distance....style was my mom's middle name.  if you have taste, you can shop anywhere....she always said....and i'd like to prove her right!  little hints and ideas ....thinking of mom...one of my very best shopping partners in crime!

whenever we showed enthusiasm over any item in a store, any store...whether in london or paris or t.j. maxx, we would gather a crowd of curious shoppers.  we learned to whisper and talk in code! 

i've just explained that to grace.  it's in the gene pool....we've gathered a crowd too.  i had to teach grace out code of shopping....mom would be so proud.  grace learned at the knee of the best!  i'm proud that i did too!  i want to share that with you!

i should probably acknowledge, i'm just blog crazy....oh! and e-bay too!  imagine that just 6 months ago....i wasn't even computer literate!!  i'm getting to do what i love.  thanks mom!

happy mother's day!  i hope that you are all pampered on your day!

 do something surprising and fun for your mother.  treat yourself to something special...even if it's a new flavor tea or coffee or magazine 

 

or a bubble bath 

 

or a nap or a walk with someone you love 

 

or a walk alone or time to sit and just daydream or make a list of all of the people you love or write a list of all of the people who have sprinkled their love on you throughout your life 

or  go to a museum live or online or buy yourself flowers 

 

or take time to blow bubbles 

or call someone you love and miss!

or rent a chick flick alone 

 

 

or celebrate your day  with family or all on your own! 

 

eat bon bons! or just hershey's!

whatever you do, make this day your own to be thankful....for the family you have....your kids who call you mom....your mom who is near or faraway or an angel watching over you today!  

don't forget to be grateful for the women who you have in your life or you've had in your life who have made a difference....just by being there for you.

think of all of the friends who have shared their mom's and those women you've been blessed to have in your life.  

call someone who has made a difference or drop them a note or just send them good thoughts!

this is a day to enjoy.  guilt free.  keep it simple. really.  no guilt.  no lists. no agendas. no tasks. no to do's. no shoulds. no woulds. no coulds. no might haves.

just enjoy your day.

you have to. you must. you will. you need to. you should. you better, darn it! hallmark says so!