Thursday, April 29, 2010


WELL, I'VE REALLY BEEN MISSING MY BLOG AND BLOG FRIENDS...HAHAHAHAHA! IF YOUR'E OUT THERE, I THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE!

LATELY, IT'S BEEN A CHALLENGE TO SIT DOWN AND WRITE.  I STILL LOVE WRITING. I STILL LOVE TELLING STORIES.
IT'S JUST BEEN CRAZY ALL WEEK.  I FEEL LIKE THE DURACELL BUNNY!  WIND UP AND KEEP GOING.  THAT'S NOT USUALLY MY STYLE.  I REALLY DO TREASURE THE TIME THAT I TAKE TO HAVE QUIET TIME. PRAYER. PEACE. CALM. BREATHE. JUST SIT. 

IT'S NOT A GOOD THING TO KEEP GOING AND GOING AND GOING AND....OOPS...GONE!  SEEMS LIKE SOME OF THAT RUSH, RUSH OF BUSY AND DOING KEEPS US FROM BEING....JUST BEING!

THANKFULLY, OUR GRACE AND T.J. MADE US REALIZE THAT A VERY LONG TIME AGO. WE LOVE TO GO AND DO!  SINCE WE'VE HAD KIDS, WE HAVE LEARNED A LOT ABOUT SLOWING DOWN TO TREASURE THE MOMENTS!  SMELL THE COFFEE! SMELL THE ROSES! 

WHEN I TAKE TIME TO HAVE MY MAXWELL HOUSE MOMENTS, I FEEL MUCH BETTER. THAT IS A VERY GOOD THING!

WHEN I TAKE TIME TO SMELL THE COFFEE, I'M AWARE OF THE LITTLE THINGS.  WHEN I TAKE TIME TO BE AWARE, LIFE IS GOOD!

WHEN I TAKE TIME TO SMELL THE ROSES, I'M HAPPIER.  JUST NOTICING NATURE. THAT "GROUNDS" ME...I HAVE A FEELING THAT'S WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT!
BE EXACTLY WHERE MY FEET ARE! THAT'S  GREAT LITTLE REMINDER FOR ME. WE JUST GET NOW. NOW IS IT.  NO REWINDS. NO DO OVERS. NO MAKE UPS. NOW IS EVERYTHING.

WHEN I LIVE IN THE HERE AND NOW, LIFE IS AWESOME!  LOTS OF RUNNING AND DOING....NOT ENOUGH "BEING"!

I HAVE SO MUCH TO SIT DOWN TO PUT DOWN ON PAPER...OOPS, NOT PAPER CYBERPAPER!
THIS WEEK.....
*MEETINGS
*DENTIST

I'M ALSO HAVING LOTS OF TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES! COMPUTER, NO WASHING MACHINE AND DRYER YET...SINCE THE FLOODING. KIND OF SCARY THAT WE HAVE SO MANY CLOTHES THAT NONE OF US ARE EVEN AFFECTED! YIKES...GOTTA GIVE AWAY MORE...MORE...MORE...MORE.
SO MUCH TO DO....DO...DO....DO...DO....DO.
OUR HOUSE IS STILL UPSIDE DOWN FROM FLOODING....DUMPSTERS STILL HERE.
THIS WEEK BIFF AND I HAVE SPENT LOTS OF TIME OUTSIDE GARDENING..WORKING ON THE YARD.  DIGGING HOLES AND PLANTING  A MILLION DAFFODIL BULBS.  WE STILL HAVE TULIP BULBS TO PLANT!  HALF A MILLION!

GROUND. DIG. ROCKS. DIRT. SHOVELS.....NEVER FELT SO GOOD.....AMIDST ALL OF THE CHAOS, IT MADE ME FEEL MORE GROUNDED! NO WONDER. NATURE. PEACE. JOY. THE SIMPLER THINGS.CHECK OUT THIS LINK. T.J.'S TEACHER CALLED ME TODAY.  I KNOW, I THOUGHT THAT TOO! NO.  HE WAS FINE.  SHE WANTED ME TO KNOW WHAT A GREAT KID HE IS...AND HAS BEEN FOR TWO YEARS IN THE UPPER MIDDLE SCHOOL.  HE HAS BEEN A PLEASURE. HE LISTENS. HE SHOWS RESPECT. HE HAS GROWN. HE HAS MORE CONFIDENCE...WONDERFUL GOOD WORDS! IF I HAD NOT HAVE BEEN HOME...JUST GAINING SOME SANITY AFTER GOING,GOING, GOING.....I NEVER WOULD HAVE GOTTEN SUCH A NICE CALL!
THE LINK THAT'S POSTED IS SOMETHING THE TEACHER AND I WERE TALKING ABOUT....KIDS IN THIS WORLD ARE DEPRIVED OF NATURE. EVERYONE IS SO BUSY WITH TECHNO STUFF....THERE'S NOT ENOUGH NATURE....PEACE.

I'LL BE BACK. QUIETLY. IT'S REALLY LATE.  TOMORROW MORNING, I HAVE BIG PLANS FOR CLEANING THE HOUSE. JULIE IS COMING! SHE REALLY HELPS ME A LOT.  SHE'S OUT OF COLLEGE AND HAS A PART TIME JOB...SHE LIVES DOWN THE STREET...SHE LOVES TO CLEAN!  HOW LUCKY AM I?  SHE EVEN WATCHES THE DOGGIES...AND WHILE WE'RE AWAY, SOMETIMES SHE CLEANS!  NOW THAT'S PRETTY AWESOME.

NEEDLESS TO SAY, I'LL PROBABLY BE BACK IN A MONTH!  REALLY, I CAN'T WAIT TO SIT DOWN TOMORROW AFTERNOON. E-BAY IS BUSY. KIDS ARE BUSY. BIFF IS BUSY. I'M BUSY. I HAVEN'T EVEN GIVEN THE PUPS A GREAT WALK ALTHOUGH THEY'VE BEEN WITH ME OUTSIDE UNTIL WAY PAST DARK.  THEY'RE GREAT COMPANY.

TOMORROW NIGHT THERE IS ABC TV ON WOMEN DRINKING AT HOME.  THANK GOD I DON'T DO THAT! WOW...THT WOULD DEFINITELY COMPLICATE MY LIFE.  TOO MUCH FOR ME TO WORK AT WITHOUT DRINKING....I CAN'T IMAGINE WHAT I'D DO IF I WERE A DRINKING MOM.  I'M CURIOUS TO SEE IT.  I THINK IT MIGHT BE SCARY...BUT I AM CURIOUS.  TO THINK HOW HARD IT IS FOR WOMEN....DRINKING HIDES LOTS OF FEELINGS.  FOR ME, DRINKING JUST MADE ME FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE ONCE WE HAD KIDS....CRAZY BUT TRUE...I NEVER WANTED TO FELL OUT OF CONTROL WITH LITTLE BABIES OR KIDS...
THE KIDS LAUGH BECAUSE BIFF AND I ALWAYS SAY, DO WE LOOK LIKE WE NEED TO DRINK TO HAVE FUN?  WE LAUGH SO HARD WHEN WE'RE TOGETHER WITH FRIENDS, WE MIGHT AS WELL BE BLOTTO!
WHY DRINK?

FEELINGS ARE HARD TO DEAL WITH SOMETIMES.  I'M GRATEFUL THAT I'VE BEEN ABLE TO TAKE THEM ON WITHOUT NUMBING THEM. WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, THAT WAS JUST FINE FOR ME! WOO HOO! 

WE ALL HAD SOME CRAZY FUN LIVING IN NEW YORK CITY TOGETHER! OH, THE STORIES I HAVE!  HAVE YOU GOT A MONTH.....MAYBE A YEAR?

ONCE WE HAD OUR KIDS, IT WASN'T THE SAME.  I STARTED TO FEEL TIRED AFTER A BEER.  ONE. I DIDN'T TRUST WINE...AT PARTIES, PEOPLE POUR AND POUR AND TOP IT OFF AND TOP IT OFF.....AND THEY DID ME NO FAVORS! BLEK! NO GOOD FOR ME. MAYBE THAT'S LUCKY!  WHAT IF?

THANKFULLY, I THOUGHT OF THAT WHAT IF A LONG TIME AGO.  SOME OF THESE CRAZY DAYS....SOME BIG LIFE EVENTS THAT ARE HARD TO DEAL WITH.....BOOM! KABOOM! BANG! WHAT IF?  WHEN I SAY I'M GRATEFUL, I MEAN IT FROM THE BOTTOM OF THE MUCK BOOTS I HAD ON IN THE DIRT.

SO, I AM GRATEFUL.  I'M GRATEFUL FOR AWARENESS.  I'M GRATEFUL THAT I CHOSE TO KEEP LIFE MUCH MORE SIMPLE....AND AT LEAST ABC WON'T HAVE TO DO THEIR SPECIAL ON ME!  

FUNNY, BIFF AND I DRANK SO LITTLE ONCE WE HAD KIDS, WE REALIZED HOW MUCH BETTER WE FELT WITHOUT DRINKING....PERIOD.  REALLY.  SIMPLY.  MORE ENERGY. BETTER SLEEP. MORE PEACE. NEVER A WORRY ABOUT DRINKING AND DRIVING.  AT LEAST, IF I SAY SOMETHING STUPID, IT'S BECAUSE I SAY SOMETHING STUPID....NOT BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING!  THAT MAY HAPPEN ON OCCASION...STILL.  BUT, MOSTLY I'M PRESENT AND ACCOUNTABLE.

GOD BLESS THE WOMEN WHO ARE STRUGGLING OUT THERE.  I'M THANKFUL  FOR PEACE.  I'M THANKFUL FOR GOOD AND HONEST. I'M THANKFUL NOT TO NUMB MY FEELINGS....I DO BETTER WITH EXERCISE!  I HAD MY DAYS DRINKING IN COLLEGE.  I HAD MY DAYS DRINKING IN OUR 20'S.  I'M GRATEFUL THAT BIFF AND I TALKED ABOUT DRINKING FROM OUR FIRST DATE.  

I'M GRATEFUL FOR THAT AWARENESS.  IT HAS MADE A DIFFERENCE IN OUR LIVES. TOGETHER. AS PARENTS. AS FRIENDS. AS FAMILY MEMBERS. AS PLAIN OLD FASHIONED PEOPLE!  I'M GRATEFUL. VERY GRATEFUL.  WITH FEELINGS.  LOTS OF FEELINGS.

HEY! WHAT IF I BLOGGED WITH A GIANT JUG OF WINE! NOW, THEN YOU'D HEAR A LOT OF "WHINE"ING!!

PEACE. BE WHERE YOU ARE. BUY FLOWERS. THINK...QUIETLY. BE. LISTEN. DREAM. SLOW DOWN. QUIET!  SIT OUTSIDE.  SMELL THE ROSES!  TAKE TIME TO SMELL THE COFFEE.  JUST SIT.

MOM'S ANNIVERSARY IS COMING UP...I THINK I'LL BUY MORE FLOWERS!  DAISIES.