Monday, August 23, 2010

Welcome home..... kind of.


On our last day on the cape, Biff and I had some time alone on the beach.  In between reading our books....Biff reading "The Box" and I was reading "The Glass Castle."


Biff, once again has the greatest book for him.  detailed, specific, left brain, informative, intelligent, filled with little know facts that he'll be happy to share with his wonderful engineer geek customers.....not that there's anything wrong with that!  We have geek in us as well!  Biff has a charming geek side....I love that too....just as long as he doesn't share all of the boring details with me!


On the other hand, I was reading my book, The Glass Castle, which I had already read a few years ago.  No, I didn't remember any details.  I remembered tidbits.  I'm easy to please.  The incredible story of all of the family craziness and chaos had me whirling through the chapters. As usual, I am spellbound by the personalities of the characters in this horrific true story.  I am amazed and astounded that the woman who wrote the story is able to live a "normal" life after surviving her childhood.

In between the pages of our books, the rising tides and the boats on parade, Biff and I took a minute....and I mean a minute.....maybe less.  I said, "Biff...."  He looked up from The Box.  I questioned, "Did you leave our house. at home, in good shape?" ....."Uh.  I was going to mention was I busy.  I thought I'd get so much more done....." I had that feeling.


We can only hope for the best!  I tried.  I left the house in pretty good order.  I cleaned.  I tossed.  I mopped. I even washed and brushed the dogs!  Ever hopeful, I said, "The kitchen?"....."Nope...not that either."  Oh well. That's when I wish I had my Samantha Stevens Superpowers!  In Bewitched, she just had to wiggle her nose.  Not so simple here.....I try....I'm not perfect..... It's o.k.  But I wanted to be perfect! As Biff always reminds me..."If you want to make God laugh, just tell Him your plans!"  Ha Ha. Ha.  Thankfully, I married a great guy with a sense of humor.  He knows I'm not perfect and he loves me anyway!! Now that's more important to me than the perfectly vacuumed rug!


I tried.  While everyone thinks that I was away lounging leisurely and quietly hedonistic, I was actually in training.  In training for a marathon....I think NOT.  I was in training to live with out being an a.d.d. homemaker.  Homemaker.  That makes me laugh.  I can make a home.  Our house is a home.  Just not the perfectly kept home.

In my defense, I can't help the flying dog fur of our goldens, Fitzy.  Daisy is eight with allergies....she sneezes occasionally.  I try.  I do the dishes.  I wash the floor.  I vacuum.  I do all of the right stuff.....just not like the people who really know how to get the job done.  On the cape, I realized while getting out my cereal.....I get out the bowl, I get out the milk, I pour the milk, I put the milk back in the fridge, I get the spoon, i get a banana, I get a knife, I cut the banana, I put the knife in the dishwasher.......on and on.

At home, there's the pivot problem.  Fridge is on one side of the kitchen....sink on the other....utensils in the drawer on a third side....that's lots of pivoting...all for the sake of one cereal.  That doesn't even include feeding others in my family.  The dogs requires more than pivoting....the cat too.....probably more that sixteen steps for each animal.  Isn't that confusing for someone who is reading a paperback for the second time around?  Just sayin'.

Biff and I chatted about what had to be done at home.  Then we went back to our books.  We were happy to drop it.  We were happy in our beach chairs.  We were happy being together.  We were happy that we each had a good book.

I came home with the usual notes to self while watching Kit in action.....laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning, order and's day one and a half......I'm still trying.   I do try......and then....I get distracted.....gotta go...Biff and the kids are looking at pics in the other room on the other computer.........distracted, me?   ya think?



The above pics make me think that there are others out there in the world who aren't the perfect becky home eckys either!

Endless Summers!

What a wonderful summer! We were on The Cape for most of it! With our friends. We've been friends for a long time now.  Since Grace and Camden's first baby swim class. That's where we met.  At the pool with our babies. New moms and new babies....the babies were seven months old...the moms were thirty somethings.  Kit was my first friend with a baby in my new stay at home mom life.

Who knew that first meet would be one that the moms would laugh about forever.  It seems that Kit was making note of the fact that i seemed so "together" as a new mom.  Color coordinated with my bouncing baby her navy polka dot lined stroller and accessorized with her big baby bonnet for sun protection and sweet swimsuit....I felt pulled together with our fun summer attire but not so pulled together emotionally!

New to the stay at home life with a new baby, husband's new job, new home and far from "home"....home being anywhere near family.  It was exciting for Biff and I to move to our new home and life to start our own family.  Just not so exciting to leave all of the family and friends in my support system as a new mom. Moving was a bigger deal with a baby.

At first my new found friends were soap opera stars who I remembered from college days.  I sat amidst the boxes while Grace napped.  My mom would say, "you meet your friends when your kids get to school."  Well, that seemed an eternity. Grace was bright but not ready for reading, writing and arithmetic.  So, when Kit wrote down her address and phone number for me, it was as though I had met my first friend on the kindergarten playground!  I went home with my scrap of paper in hand and showed Biff....I had a new friend! Maybe.

Back in those days, my friends were in little pockets of my mind....hometown friends, family friends, grammar school friends, high school friends, college friends, work friends and city friends.  Kit was a new friend.  Very new.

Once again, it seems what "Amazing Grace" told me was true.  I met many of my friends when our kids went to school...we met Kit and Camden at baby swim class!  Then again at Gymboree!  Yes, we had to be friends once we were singing to a little "gymbo the clown" going up and would be too embarrassing to share that with outsiders!  We moved on to baby music classes. we were in the same kooky playgroup, we had our second babies within a month of each other. our toddlers went to the same pre-school.  We had similar interests.  We enjoyed our jog strollers and hikes.  We both had great husbands.  Our babies became friends.  We grew our friendship over the years just as our kids learned to treasure their first friends. And the rest is history.

Here are some summer pics.....

There's not much more to say. Seeing some our summer pics is just a tidbit of the goodness that we've experienced.  We are all thrilled that we could have so much fun as a group.  The kids, the adults, the kids and the adults and all mixed up.  All of the kids really know each other, through the teenage ups and downs and hot buttons and hilarity,for good and for bad.  That's a gift.  Every friendship is a gift.  Our friends, new and old, all mixed together or one on one are a gift!  It's something I marvel at everyday.  I'm just grateful, very grateful....for our endless summers.

Oh! Did I mention that just as we sat down on the beach....Kit's husband called to say, "Hey, did you hear that they had shark sightings off of Chatham today?"  Well, we were at The National Seashore beyond Chatham....and what IF, as only a mom can think....there is that one recalcitrant shark....who doesn't stay with the others....and .....well, we didn't want to alarm the kids....we had plenty of alarm for all of us.  We noted that a shark would probably go for the surfers first.  We stayed at the breakers and not too far beyond.....because we're moms and we always have to think....JUST IN CASE scenarios.  WHAT IF?  COULD IT HAPPEN?  and all of the other mom thoughts that run through my head like a ticker tape on the stock exchange!