Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Same Ol'

Same ol'. Yup. That's my life. Not all of it. Just with Grace this week.  Grace doesn't like me. She "hates" me...if that's what "I HATE YOU" means.  I'm used to it now. I've heard it muttered, screamed, mumbled and squeaked through tears. Same ol'.

The first time I  heard those words I practically had to dive into bed and climb under the covers! Now, I realize it's a phase....that may last about 5 to 10 years. No worries. I still love Grace. I'll always love Grace. Sometimes it's more challenging than others. Not because of Grace....just because of her teenage ups and downs.

Oh, by the way, I've heard it from T.J. too. It's just not the same. The mother daughter thing is different. Everyone I know, who has girls, understands....if it's a normal relationship. It's actually healthy! Crazy but true. They have to separate from us somehow....if it's not this it's other, drugs, rock and roll? No matter's always somethin'.

I'm really not o.k. with this. I pretend it doesn't hurt. It still does. I'm grateful to have so many friends going through this with their daughters.....some even have the situation with the same girl, then boy family. A friend with girl/boy twins called today...she is at the overwhelmed stage.  It's like walking a tight rope. Everyday is different....some fun, some not, some horrible...for our daughters. It takes a toll on the moms.

But, as I say to our kids. I'm the same everyday. I wake up. I'm happy. I'm grateful. Alright, some days I'm more tired than others. Some days I have better energy for it than others. I'm pretty even keel. Pretty steady. Thankfully, their ups and downs are theirs....I just try to ride the waves. On my sailboat of life, I try to keep my rudder adjusted, my centerboard down, my sails adjusted and try not to get hit in the head by the boom!

As my friend and I said today,"Don't you wish you could call your mom and tell her about this!" Yes. And I know, no matter what, she would laugh me through it and say, oh it's just a phase.