Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Just A Moment

Sometimes it's all we need...a mom moment. I had to take a few minutes to rest...it wasn't passing out, I swear! I just had a little sugar crash.

Maybe it was after the Hershey's kisses...someone must have added some to the candy dish when i wasn't looking..really. I was really trying to control.it. A sugar hangover? No way...not me....I don't have a problem.

Sure I had a little too much. OK..maybe it's true. Maybe I just had too much. Maybe I just had one too many...I wasn't even sloppy. My words weren't slurring. No stumbling. No one told me I made a fool of myself. Phew! They didn't notice the strings from the wrappers or the foil. I didn't even consider driving.

I don't do it during the day. I don't sneak around. It's all out for everyone to share. I can't help it if no one else dipped into the stash. It all happened so fast...

Thats it....that was my last one. I'm never doing that again...I never want to feel like this again. I never want to feel out of control. Oh no! The kids noticed all of the tin foil wrappers in the garbage. They know. Kids always know. That's the worst...now they'll be rolling their eyes behind my back...not the regular teenage eye rolling...the kind they do because they're ashamed to see their mom like that...especially in front of friends or some family...again.

That's it. No more sugar hangovers. Maybe I hit bottom. maybe I just got tired of being sick and tired. I've been living in denial. I have to change.....if I can't do it for myself...I have to do it for them.

A new day. I can begin today. Just say no. Maybe I'll be a good example! Maybe they'll see that I can still have lots of fun without a candy dish in my hand! I'm doing it...one day at a time!

They have meetings everywhere.There must be one listed in the phonebook. What if people recognize me at a meeting...wait...if they're at a meeting too, that must mean they understand how hard it is to stop. oh thank goodness I'm not alone! It's all good!

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. AMEN!

One Day at a Time....

There's hope for all...one day at a time!

One Hershey's kiss at a time!
one...glass of wine...
one beer....
one .......anything.....

To thine own self be true!

Dedicated to so many family and friends who have shared so honestly about their challenges and gifts and joys...in recovery...sobriety...and showing others, by example, how much better life is today.

Also dedicated to my friends and family ....who have not yet realized how much pain, shame and sadness they've caused their families and friends or coworkers. To those who are struggling with their own truth ... we love them and pray for them always...to be freed from the anguish they live with each day.

And to the many friends and family who just couldn't do it...one day at a time. We love them so much...and they loved us...

Another Red

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